Then Samuel asked, “Are these all the sons you have?” “There is still the youngest,” Jesse replied. “But he’s out in the fields watching the sheep and goats.” “Send for him at once,” Samuel said. “We will not sit down to eat until he arrives.” -I Samuel 16:11, NLT Not much has changed in years … Continue reading “Not an youth problem!”
A Hindsight Lesson
Friends, pastors, and counselors can be valuable resources; however… ….you will ultimately be the one who has to live with your decision about your marriage and answer for it before God (see 2 Cor 5:10). One of my mistakes in my marriage’s dissolution years ago was allowing far too many people into the inner sanctum … Continue reading “A Hindsight Lesson”
HUNDREDS of texts is NOT innocent!
But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God. -John 3:21, NIV Graphic pictures of compromising behavior seems to be almost needed to convince some pastors and Christians that a spouse is violating their … Continue reading “HUNDREDS of texts is NOT innocent!”
As if it was always a mutual decision!
Publicly, some Cheaters may present the divorce story as if it was always a mutual decision based on unfortunate circumstances. They HATE when an uppity faithful spouse spills the beans, though, about their cheating. That is NOT what they want others knowing. The last thing they want is accountability or consequences for their cheating. Now, … Continue reading “As if it was always a mutual decision!”
Bigger than just “squeaky floors”
Cheater apologists are quick to point at the flaws in the marriage and blame the faithful spouse “for their part.” This is foolishness parading as wisdom. Sometimes metaphors help us understand how foolish some things actually are: The marriage is a house. This house has needed updates. For example, it needs new windows, a fresh … Continue reading “Bigger than just “squeaky floors””
How did you get that information?
“How did you get that information?” asks Cheater. A Cheater who responds this way is a Cheater still committed to her sins. She is not repentant. This is a question about how she got exposed. It is about Cheater damage control. There’s a leak! The problem isn’t her behavior. For her, the problem is you knowing about … Continue reading “How did you get that information?”
Cheater-Speak: “He’s a friend.”
Faithful Spouse: Who is he then? Cheater: A friend. Can’t I have friends? This is a common cheater ploy. They attempt to minimize the nature of their relationship with the affair partner. He (or she) is presented as “a friend.” Then they might go on the offensive accusing the faithful spouse of attempting to cut … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “He’s a friend.””
Turning from “wicked ways” is a godly precondition
If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land. -2 Chronicles 7:15, KJV (emphasis mine) God does not peddle in cheap grace. He … Continue reading “Turning from “wicked ways” is a godly precondition”
Not seeing the problem is a problem!
“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV The “Not a Problem” Problem Some cheaters are so far gone that they genuinely see no problem in cheating. They have believed the lies “justifying” their wicked sins. This is a problem. … Continue reading “Not seeing the problem is a problem!”
Emotional Affair? When does it cross the line?
An emotional affair? How can you tell? When does it cross the line? Cheaters are infamous for admitting to an emotional affair before or instead of a physical affair. Because pastors and others are poor at holding them accountable for their own actions, this opens the door for them to blame–essentially–the faithful spouse for such … Continue reading “Emotional Affair? When does it cross the line?”