Burden to their “self-discovery”

Why does cheating for some people seem necessary in their quest for “self discovery”? I do not see this as necessarily connected. One can explore oneself without betraying one’s spouse. However, I suspect this behavior is in part a holdover from cheaters never really rebelling as a youth as it wasn’t safe for them. They … Continue reading “Burden to their “self-discovery””

Father of habitual liars

For you are the children of your father the devil, and you love to do the evil things he does…. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies. -John 8:44a,c, NLT When you find someone who lies with ease, you are finding someone who … Continue reading “Father of habitual liars”

Not just watched, but seen!

You keep track of all my sorrows.     You have collected all my tears in your bottle.     You have recorded each one in your book. -Psalm 56:8, NLT A few weeks ago, I had the privilege of jumping on a live online event with Fr. Gregory Boyle. He is a priest whose life work is directed … Continue reading “Not just watched, but seen!”

Acknowledgement of Wrongs FIRST!

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” -I John 1:9, KJV What good is forgiveness to someone who does not think he or she did anything wrong? It is worthless. They are not in bondage to a conscience warning them … Continue reading “Acknowledgement of Wrongs FIRST!”

So, so confident!

“‘Now go and attack Amalek, and utterly destroy all that they have, and do not spare them. But kill both man and woman, infant and nursing child, ox and sheep, camel and donkey.’” …. Then Samuel went to Saul, and Saul said to him, “Blessed are you of the Lord! I have performed the commandment … Continue reading “So, so confident!”

Unwilling to identify with victims

Responding to Clergy Sexual Abuse situations: “There but for the grace of God go I,” says prominent Christian leader. We have a problem with church leaders over-identifying and supporting predators in the church. People–myself included–do not like feeling powerless. Yet victims are often the powerless ones in these scenarios. So, it makes sense that people … Continue reading “Unwilling to identify with victims”

Fight for your marriage by looking at your issues?!

“She cheated,” says Faithful Spouse. “Well, what you’ve got to do is fight for your marriage. Focus on fixing your shortcomings so that she wants to come back,” says Clueless Christian. No marriage exists to fight for as long as your cheater keeps lying and cheating. The very first step is to get the Cheater … Continue reading “Fight for your marriage by looking at your issues?!”

Tactic: Just admit to an “emotional affair”

“Sure, I had an emotional affair. But it was just a cry for help,” says Cheater. Sadly, this admission around some carnal Christians will lead to questions about the faithful spouse’s performance as a husband or wife: Why did she “have to” have an emotional affair?! I bet you can see where such questioning is … Continue reading “Tactic: Just admit to an “emotional affair””