“I won’t judge. But by the grace of God, there go I, too!” says Cheater apologist.

This sounds so good and high minded.

The person saying such things comes across as a super Christian. But this statement really just reveals ignorance on their part…

Someone saying this is assuming much about cheating. They are treating cheating as if it was a singular mistake. The person saying this does not realize the depths of depravity needed to execute most affairs.

The saying–“But for the grace of God, there go I”–trades on fellow Christian ignorance when it comes to infidelity.

Infidelity is a culmination of a series of deliberate sinful choices. The person did not make a mistake. They made a lifestyle of sin. 

The saying obscures this reality. Cheaters usually deliberately deceive others for significant time–months and even years! Infidelity is not like a bogeyman that jumped out and got them like the saying suggests.

Cheaters chose MULTIPLE times to engage in a lifestyle of deception and infidelity!

Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.

-I Timothy 4:16, NIV

The other thing I hate about this saying is how it engages in “sin-leveling”–i.e. suggesting all sins are on the same level. Instead of holding a cheater accountable and exhorting repentance, the saying suggests we’re all doomed to potentially doing the same heinous things. So, how could I condemn this person? 

To be clear: we condemn behavior and sin, NOT the person!

As  the Church we need to do better than this, we need to speak up for the oppressed and abused–i.e. faithful spouses. Sympathy for Cheaters ought to come after caring for the victims they have so callously wounded and discarded. It is out of place to put them at the head of the line as this saying does.