May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.
-Proverbs 5:18, NIV
When I was dating my first wife (the cheater), I remember thinking about this dynamic. A committed relationship was very different than one that was not.
The fantasy soon wears off when real life issues start impacting the relationship.
Having to figure out childcare and how to pay the mortgage will put a real damper on those sexual fantasies. These are the sort of details that have the potential to expose the fantasy for which it is.
Another thing I remember from those early days was recognizing one cannot compete with a fantasy–because the fantasy does not have to conform to reality whereas you do.
This is an argument to not even try. Let the cheater discover that life does not run on fantasies.
They are choosing a shallow life. The real good stuff often comes through going through the tough realities.
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*A version of this post ran previously.
