Not everyone deserves to hear your story. It is a privilege to be allowed entry into such an intimate and tender place.
One of the hardest lessons I am still learning is to hold what I know closer to my chest. In other words, I tend to the “over share” spectrum of sharing. I am by nature an open person.
This has landed me in trouble from time to time–including during my divorce season.
That said, I think it is vital to have someone with whom you can share you unedited journey to healing. But not everyone is safe.
People who are looking for information to pass judgment upon you are usually NOT safe people. Beware of those types!
Also, I have survived many such over-sharing flubs. If I can do that, I suggest that you can, too. Don’t beat yourself over making a mistake or two in this department.
It happens. But try to learn from the mistake and not repeat it.
One of the big problems we have had in divorce recovery groups is people over sharing on their first night! They would not come back the next week, having spilled their emotioal guts all over the floor and not knowing what would happen next.
A few guidelines we established for our groups in this area:
-We want to give you the chance to share your experience, but do it gently as you feel comfortable with others in the group.
-Be careful revealing potential illegal behavior. (We encourage people to talk to our pastor or licensed therapist who are trained for this)
-This is a confidential group. Nothing said here is to be repeated outside these walls.
Using these guidlines improved ourretention rate!