It only takes one to end the marriage. So often this fact is missed in the evangelical church. They teach as if both have a say in the marriage ending. That is simply not always the case. Many have experienced the double trauma of being cheated on and then discarded by the cheater. Without knowing … Continue reading “Can be one’s sole decision.”
Category: Trauma of adultery
The REAL problem!
Listen to this catchy new country song by Cam: The temptation is to blame the other person involved with our cheater. It is easier to focus our rage at them as opposed to the real source of our hurt. The cheater. I love the lyrics in this song talking about blaming the Other Woman as … Continue reading “The REAL problem!”
Cheated On Support Group Coming!!!
Cheated On Support Group Starting Tuesday, May 7th! At Destiny Church, Rochester, MN I have decided that it is time to launch an in-person support group for faithful spouses and their supporters. This support group will start in Rochester (MN), and I will see what response I find from folks. If it goes well, I … Continue reading “Cheated On Support Group Coming!!!”
Cheater-Speak: “I never intended to hurt you.”
“I never intended to hurt you,” says Cheater. Did you get this line (or a version of it) from your Cheater? These disordered freaks actually think this makes things better. They say this as a way to get a “pass” of sorts for their nasty, wicked behavior. They are–again–protecting themselves at the cost of caring … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I never intended to hurt you.””
Refuse to accept ANY responsibility for THEIR actions!
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad. -2 Corinthian 5:10, KJV Never, ever concede to even partial blame when it comes to the cheating of your partner. If … Continue reading “Refuse to accept ANY responsibility for THEIR actions!”
Not an youth problem!
Then Samuel asked, “Are these all the sons you have?” “There is still the youngest,” Jesse replied. “But he’s out in the fields watching the sheep and goats.” “Send for him at once,” Samuel said. “We will not sit down to eat until he arrives.” -I Samuel 16:11, NLT Not much has changed in years … Continue reading “Not an youth problem!”
HUNDREDS of texts is NOT innocent!
But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God. -John 3:21, NIV Graphic pictures of compromising behavior seems to be almost needed to convince some pastors and Christians that a spouse is violating their … Continue reading “HUNDREDS of texts is NOT innocent!”
Bigger than just “squeaky floors”
Cheater apologists are quick to point at the flaws in the marriage and blame the faithful spouse “for their part.” This is foolishness parading as wisdom. Sometimes metaphors help us understand how foolish some things actually are: The marriage is a house. This house has needed updates. For example, it needs new windows, a fresh … Continue reading “Bigger than just “squeaky floors””
Cheater-Speak: “He’s a friend.”
Faithful Spouse: Who is he then? Cheater: A friend. Can’t I have friends? This is a common cheater ploy. They attempt to minimize the nature of their relationship with the affair partner. He (or she) is presented as “a friend.” Then they might go on the offensive accusing the faithful spouse of attempting to cut … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “He’s a friend.””
Not seeing the problem is a problem!
“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV The “Not a Problem” Problem Some cheaters are so far gone that they genuinely see no problem in cheating. They have believed the lies “justifying” their wicked sins. This is a problem. … Continue reading “Not seeing the problem is a problem!”