Cheated On Support Group I will be running my support group again. It will start on Monday, September 9, 2024 at 6pm to 8pm. We will meet at Destiny Church, Rochester MN (3240 40th Ave. NW, Rochester, MN 55901). I am excited to see this group continue and hope to see new faces as we … Continue reading “Cheated On Support Group – Monday, September 9th”
Category: Cheating
PSA: They did not “have to” cheat!
Public Service Announcement (PSA): They did NOT have to cheat on you! No matter what. They chose sin over godliness, and that is on them. Personally, I think this is the most tragic thing about marital infidelity. It is also one of the oldest of lies–i.e. that they “had to” cheat. The cheater did … Continue reading “PSA: They did not “have to” cheat!”
Sick toying Cheaters
Some cheaters are acutely aware of the power they have over the faithful spouse. They understand that divorcing their spouse will mean the professional destruction of the faithful spouse. Plus, they may know that the faithful spouse is highly committed to working through even infidelity. With this knowledge, they toy with the faithful spouse taking … Continue reading “Sick toying Cheaters”
If everyone is focused on your “shortcomings”…
If everyone is focused on your “shortcomings,” then they aren’t bothering the Cheater. This is a classic move by Cheaters. They convince the pastor or other helper to focus upon the faithful spouse and their so called “shortcomings.” The faithful spouse takes the hit as they might be terrified of the marriage ending. It is … Continue reading “If everyone is focused on your “shortcomings”…”
Cheater-Speak: “But we were living apart then!”
“It is not adultery. We were living apart at the time,” says Cheater. A cheater trying to avoid responsibility for violating their marriage vows might attempt to use the “geography excuse.” This is the one where they excuse their behavior as “acceptable” since they were living apart from their spouse. The separation might have even … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “But we were living apart then!””
Back-handed “Confession”
“Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.” -Proverbs 29:25, NIV “I should have been more ‘honest’ with you [about your faults],” says Cheater. Back-handed Confessions I wonder how many of us endured back-handed “confessions” where our Cheater admitted to faults that were really … Continue reading “Back-handed “Confession””
The accusations are just “interesting” today.
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. -Proverbs 12:18, NIV I was helping Mrs. DM clean up our basement yesterday evening. While sorting through folders with old papers, I came across some of my notes from the time of my first marriage’s implosion. These notes outlined … Continue reading “The accusations are just “interesting” today.”
A divorced pastor is an asset.
3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. -2 Corinthians 1:3-4, NIV A divorced pastor is an asset. Some churches … Continue reading “A divorced pastor is an asset.”
Redeemed Fiery Trials
“When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.” -I Corinthians 13:11, NIV “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” -Popular Saying God has given us … Continue reading “Redeemed Fiery Trials”
All the counseling in the world!
But knowledge puffs up while love builds up. -I Corinthians 8:1b, NIV Knowledge is not a substitute for character. You can know all the things and still make poor choices. As a couple, you could have gone to all the wisest counselors and still ended up divorced after infidelity. Knowledge is not the same as … Continue reading “All the counseling in the world!”