Trusting God with our hurts is hard. Forgiveness is about doing just that, though. It is allowing God be God in our situation. But forgiving our cheater is nearly impossible if we believe we care more about justice than God. Justice matters to God. He did not just give sin a pass. It isn’t cheap … Continue reading “Talking justice and forgivness”
Category: Cheating
Cheater-Speak: Aren’t I allowed to have friends?!
“Beware of false prophets who come disguised as harmless sheep but are really vicious wolves.” -Matthew 7:15, NLT “Aren’t I allowed to have ‘friends?!’” -Cheater I think this is one of the most dangerous tools at the disposal of cheaters. It effectively puts the faithful spouse on the defensive as he or she tries … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: Aren’t I allowed to have friends?!”
Forgiveness does NOT eliminate natural consequences!
13 Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” Nathan replied, “The Lord has taken away your sin. You are not going to die. 14 But because by doing this you have shown utter contempt for the Lord, the son born to you will die.” -2 Samuel 12:13-14, NIV God forgave David for murder and adultery. It says so here. However, God … Continue reading “Forgiveness does NOT eliminate natural consequences!”
Church-y advice about “both sides”
Woe to those who are wise in their own eyes, And prudent in their own sight! -Isaiah 5:21, NKJV The practice of some pastors is to treat adultery on the same level as failure to do one’s share of the household chores. They are not the same! Faithful spouses are already primed to take on more responsibility … Continue reading “Church-y advice about “both sides””
Look for godly fruit!
“15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. 16 Ye shall know them by th eir fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? 17 Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit.” … Continue reading “Look for godly fruit!”
“I thought we were all called to a ministry of reconciliation? With cheaters included.”
All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation…. – 2 Corinthians 5:18, NIV Do we not all have the ministry of reconciliation as followers of Christ? Does that include reconciling with Cheaters? The obvious answer to the first question is “Yes, we are called … Continue reading ““I thought we were all called to a ministry of reconciliation? With cheaters included.””
Gun shy in sharing publicly about DM blog!
While I’ve been blogging for nearly a decade on this topic, I still keep this part of my ministry less public personally. Most people who meet me will never know I do this ministry. That said, my Facebook “friends” know as I share it there. It is one reason why I think twice about adding … Continue reading “Gun shy in sharing publicly about DM blog!”
On the death of dreams
And all his sons and all his daughters rose up to comfort him; but he refused to be comforted; and he said, “For I will go down into the grave unto my son mourning. Thus his father wept for him [Joseph].” -Genesis 37:35, KJV Giving up the dreams regarding your marriage are tough. I had … Continue reading “On the death of dreams”
Cheater Childish Mindset: “Mine! Mine! Mine!”
“‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two, but one flesh.” -Mark 10:7-8, NIV “Mine!” A Toddler’s Mindset In Marriage One of the oddest dynamics that I have seen over and again while dealing with … Continue reading “Cheater Childish Mindset: “Mine! Mine! Mine!””
Subtle blame of faithful spouses in churches
The one who sins is the one who will die. The child will not share the guilt of the parent, nor will the parent share the guilt of the child. Ezekiel 18:20a, NIV Sometimes church leaders subtly blame faithful spouses for a divorce from a cheater. I say that it is subtle because it almost … Continue reading “Subtle blame of faithful spouses in churches”