Cheater-Speak: “I feel like God is calling me to treat our marriage like Isaac on the altar.”

2 And he said, “Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.” Genesis 22:2, KJV Cheaters are engaging in self-deception when they decide God is calling … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I feel like God is calling me to treat our marriage like Isaac on the altar.””

Theology of Forgiveness: Are cheaters forgiven without admitting wrongdoing?

Peter’s words pierced their hearts, and they said to him and to the other apostles, “Brothers, what should we do?” Peter replied, “Each of you must repent of your sins and turn to God….” -Acts 2:37-38a, NLT Remember how Jesus asked God to forgive those crucifying him from the cross (see Luke 23:34)? These verses … Continue reading “Theology of Forgiveness: Are cheaters forgiven without admitting wrongdoing?”

Pro-Tip: Stop engaging in arguments about you “deserving it!”

A sage trying to work things out with a fool     gets only scorn and sarcasm for his trouble. -Proverbs 29:9, THE MESSAGE Arguing Over Why You “Deserved It” This is a wasted argument. It is like talking with someone with your face still bleeding and him/her asking you what you did to deserve having your … Continue reading “Pro-Tip: Stop engaging in arguments about you “deserving it!””

The counsel of the wicked

Blessed is the man Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, Nor stands in the path of sinners, Nor sits in the seat of the scornful…. -Psalm 1:1, NKJV I dubbed them “The Unholy Trinity.” They were a group of people that my (now ex) wife had tapped to decide the fate of our marriage, … Continue reading “The counsel of the wicked”

Choose truthful, supportive beliefs

All sort of lies are spoken about faithful spouses. Cheaters are especially “good” at the discard. They speak distorted things about who we are in order to feel better as if they are discarding us like trash. It helps them to think of us that way. You do not have to believe their lies about … Continue reading “Choose truthful, supportive beliefs”

Minimizing labeling affairs

“You shall not commit adultery.” -Exodus 20:14, NKJV Does it make it any less sinful to cheat if the marriage is troubled? The correct answer to this is “No.” Adultery is adultery. Sin is sin. Circumstances around the sin do not matter as far as determining if the behavior is sin or not. I see … Continue reading “Minimizing labeling affairs”

Cheater “honesty”

“Well, I have learned that I have to be open and honest. You never … (fill-in the cheater’s pet accusation of faithful spouse).” -Cheater to pastor/couple’s counselor Does this ring a bell for anyone? If it does, I submit it does as it is part of the demonic playbook to destroy faithful spouses. To be clear, I am … Continue reading “Cheater “honesty””

Practical Theology Question: Can Cheaters Remarry?

“And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.” -Mark 10:12, NIV Can a cheater remarry?   The simple answer to this question is “Yes.” However, the full answer is more complicated than that. It is like asking if a spouse can cheat? Yes, but… If the question is whether a … Continue reading “Practical Theology Question: Can Cheaters Remarry?”