Christians seem especially invested in the marriage autopsy. I think this is part of the control fascination. It is the idea that we control whether or not our spouse cheats and/or abandons us. For us to accept the truth–i.e. we do NOT control whether or not our spouse cheats on and/or abandons us–makes us feel … Continue reading “Many Miserably Married Yet Don’t Cheat!”
Category: Emotional Affair
Adultery, Divorce, and My Situation in the EFCA
Recently, I came across an article written by my endorsing organization, The National Association of Evangelicals. This article is entitled, “Can Pastors be Restored After Adultery.” It was posted in May 2012. The article is more or less a report from a poll taken from evangelical leaders on the question posed as the post’s title: … Continue reading “Adultery, Divorce, and My Situation in the EFCA”
Spiritual Suffering Best Addressed By Spiritual Counselors
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. -Proverbs 17:22, NIV Much of the suffering faithful spouses experience is spiritual in nature. Writing this blog for a couple of years, the questions I encounter center around deep spiritual pain and confusion. These are not so much the nuts and … Continue reading “Spiritual Suffering Best Addressed By Spiritual Counselors”
Cheaters as Predators
Truth is nowhere to be found, and whoever shuns evil becomes a prey. The Lord looked and was displeased that there was no justice. -Isaiah 59:15, NIV Sound familiar? Can you relate? -Trust is repaid with treachery. -Love repaid with contempt. -Honesty repaid with injustice. Such is the all too common lot for faithful spouses. … Continue reading “Cheaters as Predators”
Be Present For Break-Off!
Lying lips are abomination to the LORD: but they that deal truly are his delight. -Proverbs 12:22, KJV Liars lie. And cheaters by the fact that they cheated are liars. A wise person does not just take them at their word. Words need to be verified by action. I do not recommend trusting a cheater … Continue reading “Be Present For Break-Off!”
Life is too short!
The life of mortals is like grass, they flourish like a flower of the field; the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more. -Psalm 103:15-16, NIV Yesterday, we celebrated Ash Wednesday. It is a day when we are reminded of our mortality. “Ashes to ashes, dust … Continue reading “Life is too short!”
Attempting to normalize cheating…
Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Cheaters often use the same plays. This is why I believe a dark spiritual element is evident in all cases of infidelity. The commonalities in behavior are too eerily alike to be just be coincidences. Some wicked force is coordinating this evil! One thing I remember my (now) … Continue reading “Attempting to normalize cheating…”
Mailbag: Out of the blue, my pastor announced his wife cheated on and divorced him.
Dear Divorce Minister, I am a adultery (victim) survivor. I actually think my stumble onto your webpage was an answer to my prayer. Recently a minister in my large church dropped a bombshell on the congregation. He told us that his wife had had an affair, and divorced him. He never prior to this announcement … Continue reading “Mailbag: Out of the blue, my pastor announced his wife cheated on and divorced him.”
On Self-Righteous, Religious Pricks
“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? … Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye…” – Matthew 7:3, 5a, NLT When I was going through my trials, I had no shortage of religious people willing to “help” me see my “sin” or … Continue reading “On Self-Righteous, Religious Pricks”
Somethings You Have To Know Yourself
A beautiful woman who lacks discretion is like a gold ring in a pig’s snout. -Proverbs 11:22, NLT However good you are at surveillance, you will never find a way to monitor the heart. Nor should you. A spouse ought to be able to trust that their partner will honor their vows to forsake all … Continue reading “Somethings You Have To Know Yourself”