And Pharaoh hardened his heart at this time also, neither would he let the people go. -Exodus 8:32, KJV Cheaters become cheaters by going down “The Road of Bad Choices.” They have hard hearts because they have chosen to harden their hearts just as Pharaoh did. I make this point for two reasons: 1) I suspect … Continue reading “Cheaters Choose To Harden Their Hearts”
Category: Emotional Affair
Break the cycle…Start anew!
See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? -Isaiah 43:19a, NIV Reports regarding cycles of infidelity are not uncommon stories here. This is a sad but true statement. -Maybe your wife had multiple emotional affairs and this last one you caught her making it physical. You now … Continue reading “Break the cycle…Start anew!”
I am happier divorced.
Christians, pastors, and Christian counselors often paint divorce as such a horrible thing. It is as if divorced people are viewed as almost permanently damaged or forever morally tainted by virtue of being divorced. Guess what? I have a confession to make… Divorcing my cheating first wife did not doom me to a sad existence … Continue reading “I am happier divorced.”
Book Review (Part II): Gary Chapman’s ONE MORE TRY
A continuation from Part I (click here)… Book Review: Part II – One More Try: What to do when your marriage is falling apart By Gary Chapman Gary Chapman continues down a dangerous road of cheater toleration following missing the mark in his theology of divorce (see Part I). With divorce off the table as … Continue reading “Book Review (Part II): Gary Chapman’s ONE MORE TRY”
Book Review (Part I): Gary Chapman’s ONE MORE TRY
Book Review (Part I): One More Try: What to do when your marriage is falling apart by Gary Chapman My blood started to boil as I read this book from a major evangelical leader trying to “help” spouses dealing with infidelity in their marriages. It was like reading a playbook as to what exactly NOT to do … Continue reading “Book Review (Part I): Gary Chapman’s ONE MORE TRY”
PSA: Leaving for another…
Public Service Announcement: Just because a specific third party was not present at the time of the abandonment does NOT necessarily mean the cheater left for reasons other than to cheat! Some people lack capacity for monogamy. They lack the required character it takes to keep their solemn vows to God and their spouse. I … Continue reading “PSA: Leaving for another…”
A time for divorce, too.
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. – Ecclesiastes 3:1, NLT Do we really believe this Bible verse? If we do, I suggest “everything” includes a time for divorce. Sometimes the season suggests to the wise that divorce is the proper course of action. In particular, I believe this … Continue reading “A time for divorce, too.”
Time Is NOT Needed
When a cheater plays for more time to decided whether or not to stop cheating, they have already decided. (And that is a decision against the marriage, by the way.) You do not owe them that time! In fact, giving them that time is reinforcing the belief that they are entitled to such time and … Continue reading “Time Is NOT Needed”
Over the line
Have you ever done a “mind map?” As I remember them from grade school, this is a brainstorming tool where one has a main idea in a bubble then related ideas connected to that bubble to form a web like picture. I know of a situation involving a cheater who utilized this tool to figure … Continue reading “Over the line”
Christians As Easy Targets For Narcissists
This morning I woke up to an email from Chump Lady. She sent me an insightful comment made on her blog post “Quit Waiting for an Apology.“ Here is what Nyra, who left the comment, wrote: Christians are easy targets for narcissistic people to manipulate & gaslight: Christians are to forgive someone 70×70 times therefore… … Continue reading “Christians As Easy Targets For Narcissists”