Is repentance about earning forgiveness? No.

Peter’s words pierced their hearts, and they said to him and to the other apostles, “Brothers, what should we do?” Peter replied, “Each of you must repent of your sins and turn to God, and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Then you will receive the gift … Continue reading “Is repentance about earning forgiveness? No.”

Did you know Jesus condemns, too?

“Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.” -Jesus in John 3:18, NIV Jesus is condemning, too! We often make God in our own image or an image we prefer. That image of Jesus is … Continue reading “Did you know Jesus condemns, too?”

Integrity is worth a lot.

When Peter saw him [John], he asked, “Lord, what about him?” Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” – John 21:21-22, NIV It is understandable. You have been soul raped and your world has been turned upside down by your partner’s selfish, … Continue reading “Integrity is worth a lot.”

Theological Fact: God does NOT forgive everyone!

“And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.” -Matthew 7:23, KJV While I believe God makes forgiveness available to all (John 3:16, 2 Cor 5:14, etc), I do not believe all are forgiven. This verse from the Sermon on the Mount makes that much clear. … Continue reading “Theological Fact: God does NOT forgive everyone!”

Disturbed people only see it as leverage

The wicked flee though no one pursues…. -Proverbs 28:1a, NIV Disturbed people only see a history of cheating as leverage in a marriage. They could care less how the cheating has damaged and harmed the faithful spouse. The bigger problem for them is that they fear the faithful spouse “forever” holding it “over the head” … Continue reading “Disturbed people only see it as leverage”

Sadness remains

Grief lingers on long after forgiveness has put anger to bed. This is my experience now years removed from my divorce from a cheater. The anger is long gone. Yet I find myself feeling sad as I think of what was lost, tragically. I say tragically as it never had to happen. Yet God allows … Continue reading “Sadness remains”

I care about you, but not enough to…

The words of the reckless pierce like swords,     but the tongue of the wise brings healing. -Proverbs 12:18, NIV   I care about you BUT not enough… …to end my friendship with the adulterous spouse until she repents. My thoughts: “Sorry, your concern for me sounds skin deep. Scripture is clear that a person who … Continue reading “I care about you, but not enough to…”

Redeeming the experience of being abused

“When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.” -I Corinthians 13:11, NIV “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.” -Popular Saying God has given us … Continue reading “Redeeming the experience of being abused”

My frustration with some “Christian” mental health providers

“If another believer sins, rebuke that person; then if there is repentance, forgive.” -Luke 17:3b, NLT Rebuke, repentance, THEN AND ONLY  THEN, forgiveness is to be offered. This is the order Jesus Himself gave us for godly forgiveness. However, this is usually NOT the order presented to faithful spouses or Christians in other traumatic situations. … Continue reading “My frustration with some “Christian” mental health providers”

God is not blind to the injustices you are suffering!

9 The Lord is a shelter for the oppressed,     a refuge in times of trouble. 10 Those who know your name trust in you,     for you, O Lord, do not abandon those who search for you. -Psalm 9:9-10, NLT Part of the struggle following infidelity discovery is how the injustice sometimes feels unseen or devalued by outsiders. Faithful spouses are … Continue reading “God is not blind to the injustices you are suffering!”