Cheater-Speak: God forgives me.

Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV “God forgives me,” says “Christian” Cheater. “Really?! What work have … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: God forgives me.”

Empty Religious Language Manipulations

“I only say this because I love you.” -Christian busybody “For your own good, I hope you have forgiven them.” -Concerned Christian I cannot stand people who use the name of Christ to manipulate other Christians. This is the result of my experiences around the dissolution of my first marriage. I sadly encountered many “Christians” … Continue reading “Empty Religious Language Manipulations”

Forgiveness “Concern” Versus Repentance “Concern”

…and if you see him going the wrong direction, cry out and correct him. If there is true repentance on his part, forgive him. -Luke 17:3, TPT I wonder if you have experienced versions of these questions or statements. They usually come from well-meaning (but emotionally and biblically tone-deaf) Christians: “So, have you forgiven her?” … Continue reading “Forgiveness “Concern” Versus Repentance “Concern””

Telling the story

Telling the story of what happened is important if we want to change how people treat faithful spouses. The larger narrative starts to change when people learn that their friend, colleague, or even family member was mistreated by a cheater. It changes because they are emotionally invested in you and your hurts matter to them. … Continue reading “Telling the story”

Easier to blame than repent and do the self work

But let man and beast be covered with sackcloth, and cry mightily unto God: yea, let them turn every one from his evil way, and from the violence that is in their hands. -Jonah 3:8, KJV Let’s be honest: Repenting and facing one’s “demons” is hard work! This is why I think it is rarely done. The … Continue reading “Easier to blame than repent and do the self work”

3 Things Pastors Need To Know About Adultery

-3 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT ADULTERY- 1. ADULTERY IS SOUL RAPE! The Bible is clear about the principle about how a married couple is no longer two individuals in a spiritual sense but are actually one (see Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:6, I Corinthians 6:15-18, etc). Following from this oneness principle of marriage, any … Continue reading “3 Things Pastors Need To Know About Adultery”

Next step? Shake off their dust!

 And whosoever will not receive you, when ye go out of that city, shake off the very dust from your feet for a testimony against them. -Luke 9:5, KJV Jesus gave us a ministry of reconciliation (see 2 Corinthians 5:18), yet Jesus told His Disciples to move on if this ministry was rejected! Cheaters reject godly reconciliation … Continue reading “Next step? Shake off their dust!”

Is it bitterness or injustice driving this reaction?

God is a just judge, And God is angry with the wicked every day. -Psalm 7:11, NKJV Christians are quick to judge faithful spouses as “bitter” without pausing to consider another–more likely–origin of such strong anger: Injustice. To be angry at injustice is a good and godly response to have. It is not “bitterness” but … Continue reading “Is it bitterness or injustice driving this reaction?”