Are you really pining over that?!

Forgiveness is not the same thing as forgetting. In fact, I would suggest “forgetting” is just “denial” by another name. What helped me in both forgiving and moving on from my ex-wife was writing out what she actually did. Having this list in mind is very useful. Such a list is helpful in dealing with … Continue reading “Are you really pining over that?!”

Futile Enterprise – Time to Cut Your Losses

14 If any household or town refuses to welcome you or listen to your message, shake its dust from your feet as you leave. 15 I tell you the truth, the wicked cities of Sodom and Gomorrah will be better off than such a town on the judgment day. -Matthew 10:14-15, NLT A Futile Enterprise When first discovered, … Continue reading “Futile Enterprise – Time to Cut Your Losses”

Validation Before Forgiveness Talk

Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words. -Job 2:13, NLT Please do not underestimate how traumatic and disorienting discovering marital infidelity is! My personal experience as well as with those I … Continue reading “Validation Before Forgiveness Talk”

Need Seminary Classes Dealing With Divorce and Infidelity Situations

If I could write my own ticket, I would teach a seminary class on helping adultery victims and holding cheaters accountable. -Included in this class would be a primer on how divorce is not always sin as well as how divorce can be a mercy to victims of infidelity. Anger and ire ought to be … Continue reading “Need Seminary Classes Dealing With Divorce and Infidelity Situations”

Feeling Bad Is NOT Enough!

Then Saul admitted to Samuel, “Yes, I have sinned. I have disobeyed your instructions and the Lord’s command, for I was afraid of the people and did what they demanded.”  -I Samuel 15:24,  NLT Feeling Bad Is Not Enough Even though Saul called his disobedience sin, God did not accept this late and lame confession–(notice the … Continue reading “Feeling Bad Is NOT Enough!”

God Is Not Okay With Cheaters Refusing To Repent

Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV These two verse uttered by Jesus are why I doubt … Continue reading “God Is Not Okay With Cheaters Refusing To Repent”

Over-Emphasis on Unforgiveness

Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. -Hebrews 12:15b, NLT   A phenomenon all too familiar to faithful spouses is encountering “concerned” Christians “warning” them about the hazards of unforgiveness and bitterness. These same “concerned” Christians are often quick to judge a faithful spouse’s heart and slow–if … Continue reading “Over-Emphasis on Unforgiveness”

Assessing Forgiveness Vs Assessing Repentance

“The men of Nineveh will stand up at the judgment with this generation and condemn it; for they repented at the preaching of Jonah, and now something greater than Jonah is here.” -Matthew 12:41, NIV If godly forgiveness is truly unilateral, why would Jesus not simply tell his Jewish audience they are already forgiven? The … Continue reading “Assessing Forgiveness Vs Assessing Repentance”

An Important “IF”

“If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and IF they repent, forgive them.” -Luke 17:3b, NIV (Emphasis Mine) IF we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. -I John 1:9, NKJV AN IMPORTANT “IF” When Christians encounter situations where marital infidelity has taken … Continue reading “An Important “IF””

Dear DM, Do I just keep sucking it up?

Dear Divorce Minister, As hard as it is, I have been reading your posts as an offender against my husband. I have taken full responsibility for my actions, I believe I repented and worked for years to make amends. He says he has forgiven me, yet why do I feel as if I’m being constantly … Continue reading “Dear DM, Do I just keep sucking it up?”