Not one of you will enter the land I swore with uplifted hand to make your home, except Caleb son of Jephunneh and Joshua son of Nun. -Numbers 14:30, NIV While I hope my ex-wife finds repentance one day, I have moved on with my life. We will never be married again as I am … Continue reading “No Issues With Never Being Married To Her Again.”
Category: Forgiveness
Mistake Made In Re-Engaging
The Other Man was discovered. I wrote a letter to my (then) wife letting her know I would not tolerate her cheating anymore. She could either choose to work to prove to me that her cheating days were over, or she could expect me to terminate my relationship–friendship included–with her permanently. Obviously, she chose the … Continue reading “Mistake Made In Re-Engaging”
The “Model Divorced”
“Yes, we are divorced. But we’re friends. I understand I made mistakes, too, in our marriage.” – “Model” Divorcee If you do get divorced, I sense this is what people–maybe Christians especially–want to hear. They want a nice narrative where they do not have to pick sides. And maybe some divorcees can become friends with each other after the … Continue reading “The “Model Divorced””
Pro-Tip: Pastors, Faithful Spouses Need Condemnation Free Spaces
Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us…. -Romans 8:33-34a, NLT What faithful spouses need more than spiritual advice are people willing to listen to them without condemnation. Faithful spouses are recovering … Continue reading “Pro-Tip: Pastors, Faithful Spouses Need Condemnation Free Spaces”
Grieve the death
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted And saves those who are crushed in spirit.” -Psalm 34:18, NASB Metaphors, while being imperfect approximations, often can help us grasp difficult and complex truths conveying both intellectual and emotional freight with vivid imagery. Here’s my shot on explaining by metaphor why focusing on forgiveness first after adultery is cruel: Imagine you … Continue reading “Grieve the death”
God forgives me. Really?!
Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV “God forgives me,” says “Christian” Cheater. “Really?! What work have … Continue reading “God forgives me. Really?!”
Repentance Required!
When God saw what they did and how they turned from their evil ways, he relented and did not bring on them the destruction he had threatened. – Jonah 3:10, NIV To advert absolute destruction by God, the Ninevites repented and God mercifully relented from carrying out His judgment upon them. This is the clear pattern of … Continue reading “Repentance Required!”
Uppity, Cruel Cheaters
An adulterous woman consumes a man, then wipes her mouth and says, “What’s wrong with that?” – Proverbs 30:20, NLT Uppity, Cruel Cheaters People who have never experienced firsthand the contempt of a cheater are liable to underestimate their arrogance and cruelty. That is why wise Christian lay “counselors” and pastors ought to talk to … Continue reading “Uppity, Cruel Cheaters”
Forgiveness does not erase all consequences!
The Lord replied, “I have forgiven them, as you asked. …not one of them will ever see the land I promised on oath to their ancestors. No one who has treated me with contempt will ever see it. -Numbers 14:20, 23, NIV A faithful spouse may forgive a cheater yet still divorce him or her. God forgave the Israelites for … Continue reading “Forgiveness does not erase all consequences!”
Bitterness or Injustice?
God is a just judge, And God is angry with the wicked every day. -Psalm 7:11, NKJV Christians are quick to judge faithful spouses as “bitter” without pausing to consider another–more likely–origin of such strong anger: Injustice. To be angry at injustice is a good and godly response to have. It is not “bitterness” but … Continue reading “Bitterness or Injustice?”