Forgiveness Looks Like For Me

“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” – Matthew 6:14-15, NIV Forgiveness is a rather difficult concept to grasp. But it is vital to grasp it as Jesus is … Continue reading “Forgiveness Looks Like For Me”

“I care about you…”

The words of the reckless pierce like swords,     but the tongue of the wise brings healing. -Proverbs 12:18, NIV   I care about you but not enough… …to end my friendship with the adulterous spouse until she repents. My thoughts: “Sorry, your concern for me sounds skin deep. Scripture is clear that a person who … Continue reading ““I care about you…””

“You Need To Forgive Your Adulterous Spouse.”

  “You sound angry. I really think you need to forgive your spouse for cheating on you. Forgive and forget. After all, Jesus did that for you.” -Christian “Friend” to Faithful Spouse The most hurtful pieces of advice usually have a hint of truth as does this one. We do need to forgive our spouses … Continue reading ““You Need To Forgive Your Adulterous Spouse.””

Responding to Foolish Bible Applications

  Be sure to answer the foolish arguments of fools, or they will become wise in their own estimation. -Proverbs 26:5, NLT Often times, I encounter frequent flyers as far as passages used to abuse faithful spouses. Well-meaning or just self-righteous religious people spout off some verse or passage thinking they are dispensing much needed … Continue reading “Responding to Foolish Bible Applications”

“I’m not defined by my past.”

Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit … Continue reading ““I’m not defined by my past.””

True Remorse and the Cheater’s Self-Forgiveness Struggle

Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern,what readiness to see justice done. At every point you have proved yourselves to be … Continue reading “True Remorse and the Cheater’s Self-Forgiveness Struggle”

Remember Your “Cistern Story”

So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe—the ornate robe he was wearing—and they took him and threw him into the cistern. The cistern was empty; there was no water in it. – Genesis 37:23-24, NIV What’s your “Cistern Story?” Can you think of a time when your world was … Continue reading “Remember Your “Cistern Story””

More Bad Advice

“Just let her know you are there waiting. Hold the space for the marriage.” – Pastor God did not wait forever for Israel. We see that in Jeremiah 3:8. God accepted Israel’s decisions to choose against the covenant by pursuing adulterous relationships. This is part of the reason I find the advice above unhelpful. It … Continue reading “More Bad Advice”

Necessary But NOT Sufficient

The pastoral impulse to “save” marriages is strong. It is flattering and exhilirating to be a part of a resurrection story where a marriage comes back from its adulterous death. I get it. Who really wants to be the divorce attorney’s pastoral equivalent encouraging only marriage funerals? I don’t. I love miracle stories and would love to be … Continue reading “Necessary But NOT Sufficient”

Two Pastors “Talk” About DM’s Postings on TVC Scandal

Bruce wrote in response to a post (click here), David, I have read most, if not all, of your articles regarding the Village Church situation, browsed many of the links you shared, including the gut-wrenching one in this article of other similar stories. I also listened to Pastor Matt’s sermon on May 31 as I … Continue reading “Two Pastors “Talk” About DM’s Postings on TVC Scandal”