Please, Faithful Spouses, Find A Christian Advisor With A Backbone!

These last few days I have heard/read stories about Christian counselors who have failed to directly addressed adultery. They have avoided the awkward conversation insisting upon full disclosure or full commitment to rebuilding the marriage from the adulterous spouse. And these individuals have cited various reasons for this. This angers me! I know how it … Continue reading “Please, Faithful Spouses, Find A Christian Advisor With A Backbone!”

Hanging Over Their Heads Forever?

“Even if she cheats on me, I will forgive her and take her back,” Desperate Husband said. “Well, that’s no marriage. You would just hold that over her head forever,” said Mr. Worldly-Minded. This is a real exchange that I had with someone prior to discovering the irrefutable evidence of my former spouse’s adultery. I … Continue reading “Hanging Over Their Heads Forever?”

Lessons From His Scars

But he said to them, “Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe.” Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop … Continue reading “Lessons From His Scars”

We can still be friends, right? Wrong.

“You are my friends if you do what I command.” -Jesus speaking in John 15:14, NIV Friendship is a selective relationship. It is a relationship built on trust and mutual admiration. Not everyone I know is my friend. They need to pass the cut. As we read from this quoted Scripture, Jesus did not call … Continue reading “We can still be friends, right? Wrong.”

The Christmas Story Instructing Us On Adultery And Divorce

Now the birth of Jesus Christ took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been betrothed to Joseph, before they came together she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. And her husband Joseph, being a just man and unwilling to put her to shame, resolved to divorce her quietly. – Matthew … Continue reading “The Christmas Story Instructing Us On Adultery And Divorce”

Proscribing Patience For Adulterous Spouses But None For Faithful Spouses

In my trial to keep my license as a minister, a focus of the questions was about whether or not I had forgiven my ex-wife. This is a fair question to ask a minister. Bitterness in the pulpit is a dangerous thing. And we are commanded to forgive. However, the accompanying piece was conspicuously absent. … Continue reading “Proscribing Patience For Adulterous Spouses But None For Faithful Spouses”

Abusing the Example of Hosea

When the Lord began to speak through Hosea, the Lord said to him, “Go, marry a promiscuous woman and have children with her, for like an adulterous wife this land is guilty of unfaithfulness to the Lord.” – Hosea 1:2, NIV Then the Lord said to me, “Go and love your wife again, even though she commits adultery with another lover. This will illustrate that … Continue reading “Abusing the Example of Hosea”

If the Bible is clear that we are not to tolerate adultery, why then all the pressure to tolerate it in Christian marriages?

If the Bible is clear that we are not to tolerate adultery, “You shall not commit adultery.” – Exodus 20:14 (repeated in Deuteronomy 5:18), ESV (Ten Commandments) “If a man commits adultery with the wife of his neighbor, both the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.” – Leviticus 20:10, ESV “If a … Continue reading “If the Bible is clear that we are not to tolerate adultery, why then all the pressure to tolerate it in Christian marriages?”

What does forgiveness look like when your adulterous (ex) spouse is unrepentant?

Answering the mail today: “What does forgiveness (acceptance) look like when your adulterous spouse or ex-spouse is unrepentant?  (I’m speaking of this as a person divorced from a cheating ex-wife who never admitted the affair was wrong or asked for my forgiveness.. We have […] children in common, so aside from getting along for the … Continue reading “What does forgiveness look like when your adulterous (ex) spouse is unrepentant?”

The Affair As “A Cry For Help”

When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives … Continue reading “The Affair As “A Cry For Help””