So often the church has lost sight of how important lament is. God wants our honesty. And sometimes all we can give God is our tears and protests of pain. The following series of YouTube videos linked below lay out a teaching by the Christian musician, Michael Card, on the topic of lament. It blessed … Continue reading “Michael Card teachings on lament.”
Category: Grief
Blake Shelton, Miranda Lambert, and AWFUL “Christian” Infidelity Advice!
Country music star, Blake Shelton, made news recently with a tweet throwing shade at Miranda Lambert, his ex-wife. He tweeted: Been taking the high road for a long time.. I almost gave up. But I can finally see something on the horizon up there!! Wait!! Could it be?! Yep!! It’s karma!! 6:58 AM – 25 … Continue reading “Blake Shelton, Miranda Lambert, and AWFUL “Christian” Infidelity Advice!”
On curing a bad case of “The If-Onlys”
If only… …I had lost that weight. …landed that well-paying job. …spent more time at home than working. …initiated sex more. …wore sexier underwear. …was a better listener. If only…if only…if only… When you are stuck in “the if onlys,” you are stuck in trying to control something that is outside of your control–namely, the … Continue reading “On curing a bad case of “The If-Onlys””
Lock the doors, grieve the loss, and don’t be a jerk!
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted And saves those who are crushed in spirit.” -Psalm 34:18, NASB Metaphors, while being imperfect approximations, often can help us grasp difficult and complex truths conveying both intellectual and emotional freight with vivid imagery. Here’s my shot on explaining by metaphor why focusing on forgiveness first after adultery is cruel: Imagine … Continue reading “Lock the doors, grieve the loss, and don’t be a jerk!”
“I’m concerned.” Others judging faithful spouses.
“Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.” -Matthew 7:1-2, KJV A common annoyance I encounter–and suspect other faithful spouses encounter as well–are Christians giving their unsolicited assessment of my state of healing. They … Continue reading ““I’m concerned.” Others judging faithful spouses.”
Helping The Broken-Hearted Betrayed Spouse
A Christian brother comes over one night. He crumples onto your couch tears overflowing. Through his heaving sobs, you learn his wife has left him and is having sex with another man. The hollow and desperate look in his eyes tears at your heart. What can you do? I will start with the negative first. These dangerous responses … Continue reading “Helping The Broken-Hearted Betrayed Spouse”
Evocative Music…
Have you ever noticed how a song can transport you back in time to a specific moment in time? Country singer, Josh Turner, has a song that does that for me. It is “Would You Go With Me” from the album, “Your Man.” Here’s the song: It came on the radio recently and transported me … Continue reading “Evocative Music…”
Want to really help someone move on? Acknowledge the injustice.
Want to really help a faithful spouse “move on” from being cheated on? Acknowledge the very real injustices they have experienced. Christians who are so fearful of faithful spouses “getting stuck in victimhood” fail to recognize this important lesson. They fail to see that the healing cannot begin without first seeing the wound for what … Continue reading “Want to really help someone move on? Acknowledge the injustice.”
What Divorce Minister Is.
When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. -Matthew 9:36, NIV Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously Critics of me and this blog often have the wrong picture of what this website is (By the way, thank you to all those who wrote … Continue reading “What Divorce Minister Is.”
Shards of Memory
Shards of Memory When you go through a divorce, people do not usually warn you about how the effects echo for many years unless they are trying to scare you away from divorce. The echo of grief is normal. It just means you genuinely loved the person who so treacherously betrayed you. That love … Continue reading “Shards of Memory”