Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. -Romans 12:15, NKJV What astounds me about some Christians is how they believe they are helping faithful spouses by telling them that they must forgive their cheater. Most of us–faithful spouses–already understand forgiving our cheater is on docket of things to do in the … Continue reading “Who is served by the “reminder” to forgive the cheater?”
Category: Grief
On Dating: Be willing to walk away!
…I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. … For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. -Philippians 4:11b, 13, NLT I am a firm believer in not off-sourcing personal responsibility for important life decisions. Get advice, sure. But do not let someone decide your life for you. When pastors … Continue reading “On Dating: Be willing to walk away!”
Silence Helps Evil
Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. -Ephesians 5:11, NIV I am several years removed from my divorce and all the sinful, destructive shenanigans my cheating ex pulled. In fact, Mrs. DM and I will be observing our 3rd wedding anniversary later this month. So, why keep talking … Continue reading “Silence Helps Evil”
Spiritual Suffering Best Addressed By Spiritual Counselors
A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. -Proverbs 17:22, NIV Much of the suffering faithful spouses experience is spiritual in nature. Writing this blog for a couple of years, the questions I encounter center around deep spiritual pain and confusion. These are not so much the nuts and … Continue reading “Spiritual Suffering Best Addressed By Spiritual Counselors”
Movie Review: The Shack–Idolatry or Iconoclasm?
The Shack: Idolatry or Iconoclasm? Having read the book and personally met the author years ago, I was very interested in seeing how the book was translated into a movie. So, yesterday, I went to my local theater and watched it. I was not disappointed in what I saw. The movie was a well executed piece … Continue reading “Movie Review: The Shack–Idolatry or Iconoclasm?”
Some Days Smart!
Day and night I have only tears for food, while my enemies continually taunt me, saying, “Where is this God of yours?” -Psalm 42:3, NLT Valentine’s Day While couples celebrate this day, it can be an especially painful holiday for those contemptuously betrayed and dumped by their partners. I want to acknowledge that here. It … Continue reading “Some Days Smart!”
Divorce is partial soul amputation.
‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. -Matthew 19:5b-6a, NIV Like animal who gnaws off a limb to escape from a trap and certain death, a faithful spouse leaves part … Continue reading “Divorce is partial soul amputation.”
John Piper’s Son, Barnabas, Divorces
Eleven and a half years- that’s how long it lasted. Eleven and half years of marriage and then gone….When she told me she was finished it was like a knock at the door from the police chaplain – utter shock, not real, numbness, anger, fear. -Barnabas Piper, “When A Marriage Dies,” Published January 10, … Continue reading “John Piper’s Son, Barnabas, Divorces”
On “Deadwood Friends”
But Jesus said, “Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?” -Luke 22:48, NLT Some “friends” will “kiss” you with words-bespeaking of their love for you-while they further the cheater’s agenda of blame-shifting the infidelity and marriage’s demise upon you. It is confusing enough dealing with the lies and deceptions of a … Continue reading “On “Deadwood Friends””
Resurfacing Question: How Long Have You Been Married?
How long have you been married? It is an innocent question. The person asking is usually simply curious. They are not trying to “get you.” Yet it brings up an internal conflict for me: Do I answer as I suppose they are asking about my current marriage? Or do I reveal that I had been … Continue reading “Resurfacing Question: How Long Have You Been Married?”