Mailbag: Is NOT divorcing my unrepentant cheater a sin?

“Not filing to divorce an unrepentant cheating spouse is also enabling but do you think it’s dishonoring Christ by not filing? Also, if that is the case (enabling and dishonoring Christ) wouldn’t not filing actually be a sin and against Gods will?” -Eric Eric, That’s a good set of questions. Let me boil them down to … Continue reading “Mailbag: Is NOT divorcing my unrepentant cheater a sin?”

A Conspicuous Absence In Pastoral Training!

If you spent even a little time looking over the required curriculum for M.Div. students at most evangelical seminaries, you will notice a heavy emphasis on Biblical languages and Scripture exegesis. In my former denomination, this emphasis is reflected in their ordaining process, which pushes candidates to memorize Scripture for each doctrine of interest to the … Continue reading “A Conspicuous Absence In Pastoral Training!”

Pro Tip: If another dude’s feelings are more important to your wife than yours…

He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church…. –Ephesians 5:28b-29, NIV PRO TIP: If another dude’s feelings are more important to your wife than yours, then that is a clear signal that your … Continue reading “Pro Tip: If another dude’s feelings are more important to your wife than yours…”

Sick Secrets…

On my commute into work, I listen to a local radio station that dispenses relationship advice. This segment on KS95 is called “Love ’em or List ’em.” Today’s situation involved cheating and the advice given was mostly awful. A quick recap of the situation: Angela is the caller. She just got engaged but is sick … Continue reading “Sick Secrets…”

Can you live with the lies?

All day long you plot destruction.     Your tongue cuts like a sharp razor;     you’re an expert at telling lies. You love evil more than good     and lies more than truth. -Psalm 52:2-3, NLT I am a firm believer when it comes to full disclosure to the faithful spouse regarding what the cheater did. Darkness is only … Continue reading “Can you live with the lies?”

Notice how Christians expect faithful spouses to pursue but cheaters not?!

Plead with your mother, plead: for she is not my wife, neither am I her husband: let her therefore put away her whoredoms out of her sight, and her adulteries from between her breasts…. -Hosea 2:2, KJV Have you ever noticed how quick Christians are to lay the burden of marriage restoration upon the adultery … Continue reading “Notice how Christians expect faithful spouses to pursue but cheaters not?!”

Reconciling Cheaters, Better Bring Your “A” Game!

  Thus saith the LORD, Where is the bill of your mother’s divorcement, whom I have put away? or which of my creditors is it to whom I have sold you? Behold, for your iniquities have ye sold yourselves, and for your transgressions is your mother put away. -Isaiah 50:1, KJV A cheater is not … Continue reading “Reconciling Cheaters, Better Bring Your “A” Game!”

If blaming…cheaters ain’t there to reconcile!

And he said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?” The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.” -Genesis 3:11-12, NIV Just because a cheater goes to couple’s therapy … Continue reading “If blaming…cheaters ain’t there to reconcile!”

DM’s first video blogging…vlogging episode

To get out the message of Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously to more people, I have started to put my thoughts down in video form. The following YouTube video is just the first teaser of what is to come in the future. Thanks to a regular reader, he has alerted me to the reality that some people … Continue reading “DM’s first video blogging…vlogging episode”

What was the most confusing thing about the experience?

What was the most confusing part of the experience? So much is confusing and difficult when discovering a spouse has been unfaithful. So called “Christian” advice to forgive and forget in an effort to “save” the marriage is a big piece that adds to the confusion of the day. Another candidate for most confusing is the … Continue reading “What was the most confusing thing about the experience?”