“You gotta ask yourself, ‘Why did she HAVE TO leave you?’” – Cheater Apologist This is a loaded question. The person stating this is engaging in a reasoning fallacy and attempting to trap you in a less than favorable light. If you even attempt to answer the question, you will lose. No good way to … Continue reading “Why did she “HAVE TO” leave you?”
Category: Sin
Souls are my focus!
“For when the dead rise, they will neither marry nor be given in marriage. In this respect they will be like the angels in heaven.” -Matthew 22:30, NLT We were not made for human marriage. Our eternal relationship is primarily with God. We were designed to worship and serve Him like the angels. Some pastors … Continue reading “Souls are my focus!”
Preach naked and only then will I consider following Hosea’s example!
…the Lord told Isaiah son of Amoz, “Take off the burlap you have been wearing, and remove your sandals.” Isaiah did as he was told and walked around naked and barefoot. Then the Lord said, “My servant Isaiah has been walking around naked and barefoot for the last three years.” -Isaiah 20:2-3a, NLT To the pastor insisting … Continue reading “Preach naked and only then will I consider following Hosea’s example!”
Quick test of “professionals”
Question: Do you believe cheating is abuse? Anything less than an unequivocal “Yes” is a sign that this professional will attempt to blame you for the cheating. They will engage in some version of “The Shared Responsibility Lie“–namely, you are partially or fully to blame for the cheating. It is a simple test: one question. … Continue reading “Quick test of “professionals””
An “innocent party” in divorce?
Is there such thing as an “innocent party” in a divorce? Yes. I struggled with this question when fighting to retain my minister’s license years ago. Psycho-babble (and evil along with it) is winning when we cannot identify or distinguish between the innocent party and the perpetrator. Now, I understand those who say we all … Continue reading “An “innocent party” in divorce?”
You do NOT owe them agreement!
While an abusive cheater may act otherwise, he or she is NOT entitled to your agreement. They might want you to agree to a blasé narrative about why you are divorcing absent all mention of their marriage-ending sin. They might want you to agree to never bring up the cheater partner. They might want you … Continue reading “You do NOT owe them agreement!”
Thoughts On IHOPKC ELT’s Initial Findings Re:Mike Bickle Allegations
“After three weeks of examination, IHOPKC has identified five of eight alleged victims. Three of those five have publicly called the allegations lies, a fourth has not wanted to communicate with IHOPKC’s attorney, and the fifth’s allegations relate to incidents that preceded IHOPKC’s founding. Further, it became apparent that the Complaint Group did not have … Continue reading “Thoughts On IHOPKC ELT’s Initial Findings Re:Mike Bickle Allegations”
On “brutal honesty”
With their mouths the godless destroy their neighbors, but through knowledge the righteous escape. -Proverbs 11:9, NIV Ever notice how an excuse for acting with cruelty is often couched with the virtue word of “honesty?” The cheater might talk about just being “brutally honest” where the reality is that they are just “brutal” in the … Continue reading “On “brutal honesty””
Had choices to make and made bad ones!
“But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.” -Joshua 24:15, NIV I do not buy … Continue reading “Had choices to make and made bad ones!”
Why bother?
Why bother working on a marriage where one party is treating cheating as a secondary issue? Your cheater (and anyone supporting them) is telling you how little they value your well-being when they treat the affair(s) as secondary or derivative issues to the marriage. They are deprioritizing your healing. You cannot “fix” this. The Bible … Continue reading “Why bother?”