Evangelical Divorce Blame-Game

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord… Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…. -Ephesians 5:22,25, NIV I’m going to be transparent here: This passage from Ephesians 5 bothers me. It does not bother me that it is in the Bible. I thank God … Continue reading “Evangelical Divorce Blame-Game”

Helping A Shattered Spouse

A Christian brother comes over one night. He crumples onto your couch tears overflowing. Through his heaving sobs, you learn his wife has left him and is having sex with another man. The hollow and desperate look in his eyes tears at your heart. What can you do? I will start with the negative first. These dangerous responses … Continue reading “Helping A Shattered Spouse”

Performance Spells D-E-A-T-H To Marriage

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. – I John 4:18, ESV This past weekend I was at a married men’s retreat with men from my home church. At such an event, I sometimes … Continue reading “Performance Spells D-E-A-T-H To Marriage”

Adultery Helps Marriages Is An Old Lie

And why not do evil that good may come?—as some people slanderously charge us with saying. Their condemnation is just. – Romans 3:8, ESV If you are at all like me, this seems like a strange argument for the Apostle Paul to be addressing in his letter to the Romans. However, my eyes were open … Continue reading “Adultery Helps Marriages Is An Old Lie”

Must Be Therapeutic For Him…

While this is not directed at anyone in particular (I have heard these comments from several quarters), I wanted to make a statement, again, as to why I am blogging. I am responding to those who suggest I am doing this for my own therapeutic gain. This is a misunderstanding of my purpose. To be … Continue reading “Must Be Therapeutic For Him…”

Is Remarriage an Option for an Adulterous Spouse?

My post yesterday has raised questions about remarriage for the adulterous spouse and pool of divorced potential mates for divorced faithful spouses (see comments on this post here). I am going to summarize those questions into this one question: Is Remarriage an Option for an Adulterous Spouse? First, this statement only makes sense asking a … Continue reading “Is Remarriage an Option for an Adulterous Spouse?”

Mailbag: Is withholding sex from your spouse sexual immorality?

In a comment on the blog, OnlyEleven wrote, Is withholding sex from your spouse sexual immorality and therefore grounds for divorce? 3 of the 4 years of marriage have been sexless…she had sex long enough to get pg and have a much wanted baby, and has refused sex ever since. She refuses to even share … Continue reading “Mailbag: Is withholding sex from your spouse sexual immorality?”

“It Takes Two To Tango”

“It Takes Two To Tango” I wonder how many here heard this faux wisdom following the discovery of adultery and subsequent divorce. It really is just another iteration of “The Shared Responsibility Lie.” And it comes across as “wise” while being incredible hurtful to someone who has just survived adultery (aka soul rape). It is hurtful for … Continue reading ““It Takes Two To Tango””

Pre-Pigsty Prodigal or Post-Pigsty Prodigal…Continued

More Lessons from “The Parable of the Prodigal Son” My post yesterday drew lessons from “The Parable of the Prodigal Son” found in Luke 15:11-32 regarding discerning whether or not one’s adulterous spouse is exhibiting the behavior exhibited by the prodigal son post-pigsty (click here to view post). This post is a continuation of that … Continue reading “Pre-Pigsty Prodigal or Post-Pigsty Prodigal…Continued”

Pre-Pigsty Prodigal OR Post-Pigsty Prodigal?

Lessons from “The Parable of the Prodigal Son” In Luke 15:11-32, we have the famous parable about the prodigal son. It is a story with two sons and a father who welcomes the younger son back after he wasted his inheritance on “wild living” (Luke 15:13b, NIV). This story lives in our pop culture when … Continue reading “Pre-Pigsty Prodigal OR Post-Pigsty Prodigal?”