But those who won’t care for their relatives, especially those in their own household, have denied the true faith. Such people are worse than unbelievers.
-I Timothy 5:8, NLT
I remember the panic I felt when my cheater used her financial strength as a weapon against me.
She was the one with the decent job and wages keeping us afloat. I was working at a coffee shop still trying to break into my field.
Her and her supporters used this verse out of I Timothy out of context to mean I was worse than an unbeliever since my wages were not enough to support us or myself alone.
The irony I see now is how this verse more appropriately applies to someone who has the finances but chooses to withhold them from supporting their own household. In other words, it is not a gender specified wicked move.
In other words, her supporters’ twisted reading of this Scripture lead them to encourage her to actually live out the exact thing this verse warns against–namely, pulling out finances needed to keep the household afloat.
But that is typical cheater.
Cheaters are quick to shout, “MINE!” and slow to live up to the obligations they freely agreed were part of the marriage deal–like that “all what is mine is yours” part of the vows.
Still, I had it better than most.
At least, I had not been a stay-at-home mother for decades without resources to access a good job down the road. I had an education that has led me to an excellent career today. And I did not have to worry about providing for children on top of that. Such was a mercy in my situation.
Using financial strength to further brutalize faithful spouses is just one more thing cheaters do. It is sick. And it is wrong.
Sadly, it is yet another thing well-meaning (but WRONG!) Christian leaders never confront in the cheater. Instead, they blame the vulnerable and abused in the matter.
Sick but typical.
*A version of this post ran previously.
