“He never talks to me!” whines Cheater.
I find it really rich that a cheater would complain about lack of communication from the faithful spouse.
It takes a lot of prideful blindness to make such a complaint. Pure chutzpah!
Remember:
The cheater is perfectly fine not communicating with the faithful spouse how they are stealing intimacy and putting the faithful spouse’s well-being at risk.
But we need to develop the faithful spouse’s communication skills?! Yeah, right.
It isn’t a communication issue. This is an adultery and deceit issue. The cheater’s.
I have no doubt every couple has room for improvement on the communication arena. The issue when cheaters bring this up is how it is a distraction.
They are pointing at a bleeding nose as they carve out their spouse’s heart with a spoon.
Put the “spoon” down.
The problem isn’t a bleeding nose. It is adultery.
In fact, a savvy pastor or Christian counselor can put the cheater on notice if they dare complain about communication:
Do you hate it when he doesn’t talk with you and keeps you out? How do you think he feels when you did the same about your cheating with another man?
What about all the big, nasty secrets you kept from him? Isn’t that a communication issue, too? You shut him out of all of that.
I am happy to explore communication issues with you. However, we need to resolve these infidelity related “communication” issues first before we can even start to talk about other communication issues.
