Dating again? Look for character.
I know it is scary to think of this happening to you, again. Dating can be both thrilling and scary. It is hard to trust, again, after being so burned.
First, I would recommend NOT dating until your divorce is finalized.
You do not need to be in a hurry to find another partner. This time–however long–is best invested in yourself. Rebuild your confidence in yourself and discover hobbies that may have been suppressed during your marriage to your Cheater.
Second, do not date until you are happy living as a single person–i.e. learn to like yourself.
You have to like yourself first before you are safe going out into the dating world. If you go out there looking for validation, you might find another manipulator who smells your desperation and uses that against you.
Third, have deal-breakers and stick to them.
One of my deal-breakers is that I would not date a married person–i.e. a “separated” person. After what I went through, I did not trust such a report and would not do that to another person–i.e. faithful spouse.
Finally, date for character.
Is this person kind? Are they considerate of others? How do they treat the servers at a restaurant? How are they around pets? Do they apologize readily when wrong?
Cheating is a character deficit problem. So, you want to find someone who is solid in character. One of my favorite characteristics to look for in a person with good character is being a poor liar–i.e. lying is not easy for them.
