“Divorce is of the Devil!”
-Christian leader
I want to begin this post by owning that this was probably how I would have talked about divorce prior to my own experience with it. My Christian background was very anti-divorce. This made my situation with my first (now ex) wife even more painful than it had to be, sadly.
Teaching divorce as from Satan is an erroneous and dangerous teaching. It causes pain for both faithful spouses abandoned and those who choose divorce over tolerance of ongoing adulterous abuse.
This is a teaching worthy of some correction. Let’s do some basic theology of divorce:
How do I know divorce is not from Satan?
Well, God is described as divorcing Israel in the Bible. Since God cannot sin, divorce cannot have an evil origin.
She saw that I divorced faithless Israel because of her adultery.
-Jeremiah 3:8a, NLT
Divorce can be a mercy.
I am so grateful for my divorce today. It cleared the way both for the ministry I have today as well as for the family I now have. God preserved me from remaining stuck with a spouse who refused to repent of her adulterous ways.
Is divorce in some cases evil?
Yes.
Sometimes people use divorce to pursue selfish, sinful ends. This especially includes cheaters who choose divorce instead of repentance. That is truly wicked.
This one is hard to deal with. I was very anti divorce before my wife’s affair. I still struggle with it. I’ve gone over and over it. I had a dream last night about my ex wife and her not showing any actions that indicated true repentance.