Worse… so much worse! I remember early in my first marriage’s ending how I was hoping it was “just” an emotional affair. The whole not taking emotional affairs seriously was a problem I was yet to reckon with personally. The reality is the cheating is usually MUCH worse than what we see in the initial … Continue reading “Worse… so much worse!”
Author: Divorce Minister
Top Christian Divorce Blog on Feedspot
Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously has been selected by Feedspot as a top 15 Christian Divorce blog and website (link here). I am grateful for such an award and exposure. The hope is that more people in need of a Christian voice on such matters will find their ways to these electronic shores for hope … Continue reading “Top Christian Divorce Blog on Feedspot”
So called “justifications”
“We were already divorced in our hearts,” says Cheater. “Our marriage has had problems for years,” says Cheater. “I’ve been unhappy in our marriage for a long time,” says Cheater. Cheaters accept lies to “justify” their sinful behavior. This is what is at the root of the problem for Cheaters. They have bought into lies. … Continue reading “So called “justifications””
Faith over fear
And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, “Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.” -Mark 9:24, KJV Like this father, sometimes we need help with our unbelief. I believe anxiety (non-medical kind) and fear are rooted in unbelief in God’s goodness towards us. More specifically, we struggle to believe … Continue reading “Faith over fear”
Sharing a song to encourage
Sometimes we need reminders of what our inheritance is in Christ. We can get fixated on what is “wrong” with the world. Today, I want to share a song of encouragement. It is entitled “Ain’t No Grave” by Bethel Music and Molly Skaggs. Enjoy: *I posted this song previously.
Tainted Fruit
18 “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. 19 See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? -Isaiah 43:18-19a, NIV What do we do with the good things that we gained through our marriage to our Cheater?! It feels like tainted fruit, honestly. Such gifts are … Continue reading “Tainted Fruit”
Need to preach about righteous divorces
Sharing only testimonies of reconciled and restored marriages following adultery… …feeds false hope in “reconciliation” for faithful spouses dealing with unrepentant cheaters. Show of hands. How many here thought their marriage was going to “make it” and then you would have a testimony about marriage reconciliation to share with others? I know I did. The … Continue reading “Need to preach about righteous divorces”
Person, not an object
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. -Ephesians 5:21, NLT Marriage is NOT about what you can extract from the other partner. A Christian marriage is not a contract for “goods.” I suspect many Cheater approaches marriage like a calculation. Some decide that they are no longer getting enough of a … Continue reading “Person, not an object”
Cannot put the genie back in the bottle
For the woman’s jealous husband will be furious, and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge. -Proverbs 6:34, NLT In the early stages post-discovery, it is natural to try to wake up from the “bad dream.” Unfortunately, you will learn–painfully–that the genie cannot go back into that bottle. If you are at all … Continue reading “Cannot put the genie back in the bottle”
Emotional Affair Back-Handed Blaming
Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. -Hebrews 13:4, NLT Emotional Affair Back-Handed Blaming So, your Cheater admits to an “emotional affair.” They may even do this in the presence of a pastor or counselor. How does … Continue reading “Emotional Affair Back-Handed Blaming”