Calling the Focus on the Family® Helpline
When the Other Man was revealed to me, I called a helpline to figure out my next steps. Specifically, I called the Focus on the Family® Helpline (1-855-771-HELP (4357)). It actually was supportive for me.
My mother had called earlier and had a very bad experience with the counselor on the phone who participated in blaming me for the marriage crisis. However, I had a very different experience when I called.
Maybe some of you have used this crisis line as well?
I told the counselor about the evidence I had. It did not take him more than a few seconds to diagnose the problem–i.e. my then wife was committing adultery and trying to get others to justify her cheating ways.
It did not take him more than a few seconds to diagnose the problem–i.e. my then wife was committing adultery and trying to get others to justify her cheating ways.
He helped me see that I was not an abusive husband and that started me on the path of unplugging that particular lie from my (now) ex-wife.
This counselor, also, exhorted me to take my evidence to our mutual pastor and ask him to confront my (now) ex-wife per Matthew 18 principles. I told the counselor that I did not think this pastor would do it, but the counselor insisted that I try.
So, I asked this pastor to confront my ex (wife), and he predictably refused to do so citing that she was not attending his church regularly anymore, plus he did not believe the evidence meant she was cheating.
I had to confront her myself, which I did.
While I do not agree with all of the teachings and positions of Focus on the Family® or Dr. Dobson, I am grateful for their help at this time. They were one evangelical voice that read the situation correctly and provided sound advice for dealing with the infidelity.
The reason I share this is to offer another resource for my readership to consider.
It may be a mix bag as to how the counselor responds to your situation as my own mother discovered; however, I can tell you that in my personal experience the helpline took my (now) ex-wife’s infidelity seriously and applied the Biblical principles appropriately.
*A version of this post ran previously.
