Rescue me, Lord, from evildoers;
protect me from the violent,
who devise evil plans in their hearts
and stir up war every day.
They make their tongues as sharp as a serpent’s;
the poison of vipers is on their lips.-Psalm 140:1-3, NIV
Cheaters know what they are doing.
-They lie to avoid giving the faithful spouse the power that comes with knowing.
-They steal because they know the faithful spouse will not approve of their giving to another lover.
-They abuse because they enjoy the power and refuse to give it up and repent.
These dynamics are dynamics each Christian needs to understand before offering any advice to faithful spouses. The faithful spouse does NOT need to suffer the consequences of another Christian’s naivete.
I still get upset when I think about all I endured when I think about it in any depth.
One reason faithful spouses get so upset about what happened to them is they lived through the abuse and manipulation of their cheater. It was nasty stuff, folks!
Cheaters and their supporters might have even weaponized the faithful spouse’s commitment to honoring God to further manipulate them.
I believe this happened to me.
And this is why I created this blog. I know I am not alone in that experience, and my hope is this blog will provide some much needed shepherding through such abusive practices.
If you want to learn about the depravity of humans, just listen to a story or two from a faithful spouse about how their adulterous spouse treated them.
If you want to discover what tactics Satan uses to destroy people, just listen to the tactics used by cheaters in manipulating and otherwise attacking faithful spouses.
It is not pretty. However, awareness is the first step to dealing with such evil as the Bible teaches us (see 2 Cor 2:11).
Make no mistake:
Cheating involves abuse, manipulation, and lies. That is why our feelings about cheating are so intense.
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*A version of this post ran previously.
