I don’t get faithful spouses wanting to be friends with their Cheaters.

Sure, there’s pressure to do this “for the kids” if kids are involved. Some may feel pressure from outsiders to do this to not burden them with the ugliness that is reality.

It makes sense for Cheaters to want this–i.e. to be “friends.” It is a way to make it seem like what they did was “no big deal.” It’s image management.

The reality is:

Cheaters are NOT friend material!

They lived a life of lies and deception for months or years–in some cases–abusing the faithful spouse often gaslighting them into thinking they were imagining things. Some even weaponized counseling sessions to further tear down the faithful spouse’s self worth.

That is not friend behavior.

Enemies are kinder, less cruel.

Forgiveness does not mean we have to be friends with our Cheaters. In fact, I would suggest it would be unwise as they are abusers and have a history of abusing YOU! They are unsafe.

Please, do not feel bad if you have no desire to be friends with your Cheater. That is a healthy and wise choice!