“I’m sure there were issues on both sides. There always are.”
-Christian “friend”
One of the many things that astound me with this all too common response from other Christians regarding a divorce is how cheap they sell out their so called “friends.”
Do you think so little of your Christian friends that you believe they would just divorce over trivial issues?
Or is this just a smokescreen?
I think it is the later. It means the “friend” can go on pretending nothing happened.
They do not have to deal with the awkwardness of facing the evil of adultery perpetuated by one of their so called friends against the other.
This is not the behavior or stance of a true friend. In the their time of greatest need, a true friend does not choose willful blindness to said need.
They are not indifferent to their friend being soul raped!
They meet their friend in the ashes and hold them through the darkness of this injustice. A true does not make excuses for the wickedness of one party against the other.
It is true that every marriage has “issues on both sides.” What isn’t true is that every marriage does not have the issues that arise from one partner committing adultery against the other!
A true Christian friend understands this. Furthermore, they understand something BIG must have happened for the divorce to have happened.
They do not stick their heads in the sand and pretend those HUGE issues are not there!
A true Christian understands their friend must be hurting and seeks to help better by being open to knowing what that BIG issue was.
I think one of the reasons so many Christian people think this is because in all honesty they think it couldn’t happen to them. They think the other person Had to be doing something wrong or it wouldn’t have happened.
In all honesty, I was completely blindsided. I knew my husband was going through something but never would have thought another woman. He didn’t spend the night away or weekends gone. His was happening while working and he was self employed so who knows how he spent those days.
Image control for both of them as she was married also.
He was an excellent actor in faking his love for me in front of our kids but no sex in private. I chalked it up to his depression at the time. How stupid was I but when you trust a spouse, this can happen.
Marie you are not stupid. Satan is cunning. When our spouses choose to engage in those activities they recieve the cloak and dagger that Satan offers them….its all part of how they make adultery seem justified in their minds.