Reality validation.
This is gift others can give to a faithful spouse.
Sometimes we need someone to tell us the simple but hard truth.
The adultery happened.
And–no–we are in no way responsible for the infidelity. It was wrong.
No justification for the cheater cheating exists.
I think these messages are especially important for the faithful spouse to hear in order to heal. We need support early after the discovery, especially.
Our reality is likely being denied by the cheater (and possibly even other Christians–including some pastors).
The last we need is someone minimizing what happened. We don’t need someone trying to make excuses for the cheater.
This is not to say they demonize the cheater. What it means is appropriately labeling adultery as sin and appropriately laying the responsibility fully at the feet of the sinner–i.e. the adulterous party.
So, if this post finds you after discovering the infidelity…
Believe your eyes. It happened.
And it was wrong.
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