Lysa TerKeurst Divorcing, Apparently

TerKeust, who has five children, said she believes the “wisest (and hardest) choice I can make is to stop fighting to save my marriage of 29 years and, instead, accept reality.”

-from “Lysa TerKeurst announces divorce after battling to save marriage, standing ‘firm’ in faith despite pain” by Leah MarieAnn Klett in The Christian Post, Sunday, January 2, 2022.

While it is always tragic when a marriage ends due to infidelity (which is the likely cause based on her past and present statements), I have conflicted feelings about this announcement.

This evangelical author went out there peddling teachings on “forgiveness” and such during the five years or so that she was denying “reality.”

Those sort of teachings backed by her erroneously chosen path is what keep faithful spouses stuck in abusive relationships with cheaters.
Instead of taking this as an opportunity to teach on divorce and correcting her story, she shuts down that conversation. Now she want privacy.

 

“While there is clear biblical justification for my decision to end this marriage, I am choosing to hold most of the details private out of respect for our children and grandchildren, and to give space and privacy for my family and me to continue to heal,” she wrote.

Is that respectful of the children and grandchildren?

I would suggest a more respectful stance would be to spell out the biblical grounds for divorce as oppose to simply hint at them for all to infer. Make it clear for both the children and public. This is doubly important as a leader who has profited from the public following your life teachings:

The Bible allows for divorce when a spouse chooses to practice marital infidelity with all the accompanying deception and lies (see Jeremiah 3:8 and Matthew 19:9). Forgiveness is not the primary issue of concern in these situations, but rather protection for the faithful partner from the ongoing, willful abuse of the cheater. That is why, I suspect, God offers divorce as a mercy to faithful partners.

In a sense, I do agree with her that we all do not need to know the gory details or blow-by-blow of what tanked her marriage. However, I do not think it is too much to ask for a public, Christian leader to paint the broad picture of what happened with what was the marriage-ending sin involved.

While such exposure is difficult, this is the hard part of making a living off of being a Christian “celebrity” leader. No one forced her to choose that way to make a living. A responsible Christian leader would accept this hard part and teach accordingly.