While I dearly hope some of the tough love counsel I share here saves marriages, I do not see that as my job or calling. I am a pastor, and my calling is to feed the sheep. I am called to soul care.
Marriages will not exist in the Heaven (Mt 22:30). But souls will.
I dearly hope God works miracles and marriages ravaged by adultery are resurrected. However, just as I do not tell terminally ill patients and families as a chaplain that God will heal their loved one, I do not tell people with marriages ravaged by adultery that God will resurrect their decimated marriage.
To be clear: My God does do miracles. However, they are called a miracle for a reason. It is out of the natural order of things. Resurrection today is the exception and not the rule. This is true of marriages ravaged by adultery as well.
I make no apologies for taking this position. I am not a marriage counselor. No, I am a pastor and professional chaplain. Prophetically, I see my job as to advocate for righteousness and holiness while caring for the sheep. Sometimes that means advocating for the marriage, and sometimes it does not. Regardless, I will not counsel in a way that encourages or facilitates sin.
Souls are too precious for that.
Pastor David, something has always troubled me re:heaven, as in my case my first husband died and when I remarried several years later I have had a reaccuring dream, the theme is “What happens with two husbands”? That is probably a mute point now since I discovered my Wasbands emotional affair. Reconciliation was a dismal failure, but I’m still curious about that scenario ?
Jesus is actually addressing that very question in the passage I reference in my post here. He was posed the question over who would be the real husband of the wife at the Resurrection after she was married by multiple men. Jesus tells us that we do not know Heaven/Resurrection if we think marriage exists there. My conjecture (as this is mostly my guess) is that our relationships will be so healthy and whole that even the best moments in a good marriage will only be shadows of what is to come in the next life. Our relationships will be that intimate that marriage would no longer be necessary or make sense. Just my speculation on the matter. What we do know from Scripture is that marriage does not exist and so we will be no one’s wife/husband (with the metaphorical exception of being Christ’s Bride–i.e. the Church being).