Not one of you will enter the land I swore with uplifted hand to make your home, except Caleb son of Jephunneh and Joshua son of Nun.
-Numbers 14:30, NIV
While I hope my ex-wife finds repentance one day, I have moved on with my life. We will never be married again as I am married to another.
The closing of this option for my ex-wife does not bother my conscience in the least.
Scripture is full of examples where God levels consequences for sin with finality. The verse above regarding the rebellious children of Israel are just one example.
Ananias and Sapphira in the New Testament (Acts 5) is another example. They were struck dead on the spot for their sins. God did not give them a “do over.”
Their sins were treated with deadly seriousness and absolute finality.
I know some evangelical pastors will disagree with my stance on this matter. However, I fail to see God providing permission to divorce (see Matthew 5:32 and 19:9) without providing the option to remarry–even with a living ex-spouse.
God is being consistent with that permission for the faithful spouse to move on from the adultery ravaged marriage.
He is allowing faithful spouses to treat adultery as a sin with final consequences as it comes to the marriage. I am convinced divorce (and permission to remarry) are a mercy for faithful spouses.
Does it bother me that I am no longer available to marry an even repentant ex-wife?
Not in the least.
She made choices. I respect her agency to make those choices even though they were highly destructive choices.
A consequence of those sinful choices was losing the privilege of being married to me. In my case, that consequence is now final.
That is what happens in the case of some sins. And it is not on me or God as in other situations when the consequences for those sins are treated with finality. The consequence for those sins are upon the sinner.
