Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!
-Isaiah 5:20, KJV
Part of the injustice faithful spouses often experience is a community of people–even confessing Christians–who will not accept what happened. Some might even accept it happened and then blame the faithful spouse–if only in part–for the adultery or subsequent divorce.
My encouragement to faithful spouses is not to waste energy on such individuals. If they know what happened and choose to blame the faithful spouse, then they are have chosen an unbiblical position.
In other words, they are wrong.
It is not your job to convict them of this wrongful choice and stance. That’s the Holy Spirit’s place.
Move on to relationships that actually are supportive, instead.
Faithful spouses–present company included–waste great amounts of energy trying to fix the world to make it as it “should be” or–in other words–get people to stop believing lies. The big lie here being that wrongful things like adultery have a shared cause from both marriage partners.
To find healing, I think one has to get to the place where one is willing to accept some people will continue to choose to be wrong on the matter. This is okay for you, because you know in your heart that they are wrong about you and what happened.
Acceptance does not mean you like it, but rather you understand that is the sad reality–namely, some people will choose to believe a lie even when given the truth.
Others can and will be wrong.
But their wrongness does not change the truth of the matter for you.
*A version of this post ran previously.
