Lying lips are abomination to the Lord: but they that deal truly are his delight.
-Proverbs 12:22, KJV
One of the main reasons I am really skeptical of marriages “surviving” infidelity is the challenge of changing a sin pattern in the cheater.
This is the pattern of speaking and believing lies. I add the second part, because I believe the “best” liars are the ones that believe their own press.
Often times, Cheaters have been lying for months if not years!
It is naive to think they will be able to stop something that has become a habit–namely, lying. The cheating is a symptom–not of the marriage issues–but of the character deficit of the cheater (see Mark 7:21-23). Sadly, this is a VERY BIG problem!
Maybe you might get your cheater to end the affair. However, that just means you will be living with a “dry drunk” unless he or she actually does the character work of dealing with the lies.
Honestly, I believe the lies are what do the most lasting damage.
It is hard to trust someone, again, who lied to your face for months or years while violating the sacred of human vows. Plus, I question the cheater’s capacity to walk in the light after such a prolonged time walking in the darkness of their lies and willful deceptions.
