“I’m praying for you guys,” says well-meaning Christian “friend.”

“But she is cheating on me,” exclaims faithful husband.

“I don’t want to take sides,” says well-meaning Christian “friend.”

 This person is NOT a true friend.

They were just informed about the cheating, and they punted on caring for the abused party. That is not friend material behavior. In fact, it calls into question their “Christian” credentials, too, in my opinion.

What if you had simply replaced the word “cheating” with [physically] “beating” me?

Most sane people would agree that such behavior is unacceptable. The worries about taking a side would abate in the harsh reality that one’s friend is being harmed physically.

I don’t see it all that different when it comes to cheating.

Cheating is abuse. The unfaithful partner is lying and taking away the faithful party’s ability to have consensual, marital sex as they are not informing them of the [risky] sexual activity outside the marriage.

Plus, many Cheater will gaslight their spouse once they have an inkling that cheating is happening. It is truly damaging on so many levels for the faithful party.

Feigning neutrality is not a option for someone who cares about the well-being of the faithful party.

The only appropriate response of a true friend is condemnation of such abusive behavior and care for the faithful party. It is not so difficult to see that once you understand cheating as abuse.

Choosing “neutrality” sends the message that their discomfort over “picking sides” is more important than the faithful party’s well-being.