Saying does not make it so.

“I’m being faithful to God,” says Cheater.

“It sounds like you believe that [which is a complete lie],” replies Faithful Spouse.

Saying does not make it so!

Cheaters say all sorts of things. You could have them dead to rights, and they will bust out this gem (see above). To them, their lies need not be fettered by reality.

They think they can simply say something into being… or they simply have lost touch with reality having given themselves over to lies.

I think Cheaters still understand what they are saying is ridiculous to some degree. This is why they push hard for our agreement with their lies. They are struggling for validation for their awful behavior.

Instead of arguing over reality, I found it helpful to simply validate that it sounds like they believe something.

Fighting over reality is not worth the effort. Cheaters will fight tooth and nail to get you sucked into their sick world. It’s best to hold them at arms length.

They are allowed to believe whatever–including lies–that they want to believe. You don’t have to agree to believe what they believe, though.