“If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them.”
-Luke 17:3b, NIV
If you are stabbing your mate in the soul by committing adultery and twisting the “knife” by lying about it, you are not spiritually healthy. You are spiritually sick.
Forgiveness from a faithful spouse does not necessarily remedy this sickness. The sick person must take steps to address their sickness in order to become well.
Those steps–per Jesus–are steps of repentance.
This gives me peace. The sin will either continue to fester, or it will be addressed via repentance by the cheater. It is one or the other.
I can release my ex and her supporters to God–which I did and is my part in the forgiveness relationship. However, that gift will do them no good unless they repent–i.e. turn from their sin and address it for the spiritual sickness it is.
People pressuring faithful spouses to forgive their cheaters fail to understand this…
The forgiveness from the faithful party does not solve the underlying spiritual sickness, because the only one who can do anything about that is the cheater himself or herself.
This is so very true, DM. Thank you!
Exactamundo.