Even a child is known by his doings, Whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.
-Proverbs 20:11, KJV
We, faithful spouses, have a tendency to put up with terrible “help.” I know I did.
A Cheater could confess to an emotional affair with a therapist or pastor present, and then we would allow them to spend the rest of the visit blaming us for their sin. This is missing the mark for a therapist or pastor, in my lay opinion.
A good pastor or therapist would stop the Cheater in her tracks after such a confession. They would work to convey how serious an emotional affair is and how wrong such behavior is!
Sadly, the siren calls of “communication issues” and “relationship problems” beacons too many the the rocks of sinful marriage disaster.
My recommendation for the newly discovered folks here is to insist on whomever is helping to take the cheating seriously. This means not allowing the subject to change.
If your Cheater is unwilling to attend sessions where their sinful behavior is front and center, then they are telling you that they are unrepentant. Just beware of those counselors unwilling to make Cheaters uncomfortable.
