18 Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old.
19 Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.
-Isaiah 43:18-19, KJV
When the news broke for me, I remember driving on the highway and wanting “it all to go back to normal.”
The problem with this is that there is no going back. The only options are to remain stuck or to move forward with a new life. Back to “normal” is not an option our cheaters give us.
They blew up “normal” with their infidelity and decision to leave us.
I know that is a brutal truth to digest. However, the sooner we accept this awful reality, the sooner we will be able to deal with the dark realities surrounding it.
We won’t be vulnerable to undignified displays for the cheater. Plus, we will be less vulnerable to manipulation both by the cheater and those who are of the “never divorce” crowd.
I understand how hard it is to let go of that “normal” vision.
But it is a mirage. You need to let it go for it is gone (and may never had existed in the first place, sadly).
The more we walk in reality–however hard–the healthier we will be as we are walking in truth. This is the spiritual secret to health. It is hard but necessary.
*A version of this post ran previously.
I am definitely getting there, but sometimes this wandering in the wilderness gets draining. She has moved on to engagement and a new house, and she has the audacity to ask me why my heart is so hard to her. I pray for them and my children, but I do not have to have love or feelings of like for her.