“This is the covenant I will make with the people of Israel after that time,” declares the LORD. “I will put my law in their minds and write it on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people.”
-Jeremiah 31:33, NIV
If your spouse lacks an internal moral compass, then watch out!
We were never meant to set boundaries and rules for another adult in our lives. They are supposed to know right from wrong as a mature adult. No one wants to essentially function as the parent to one’s partner.
If your partner needs help understanding boundary violations in a relationship, he or she is not mature enough to be in a relationship. In other words, they haven’t grown up yet. They are morally immature, and that is spiritually dangerous.
For example…
-A spouse ought not have to tell their partner removing their wedding ring and going out to bars is not right.
-A spouse ought not have to tell his partner that going on coffee dates with someone of the opposite sex that she met while out dancing with the girls is not right.
-A spouse ought not to have to tell their partner that exchanging hundreds of text messages with a strange woman unknown to one’s spouse is not right.
…I think you get the picture.
If you are constantly asked to give the “letter of the law” for a spouse, then do not be surprise when that same spouse rebels. They have not matured to owning their own moral commitments, in my opinion.
This is a set up to be the “parent” against whom this spouse never rebelled.
As the verse from Jeremiah suggests, I wonder about their salvation when they do not seem to have God’s law written on their own heart. Why can they not hear Holy Spirit on their own warning them about this sinful behavior?!
Certainly, they are still “at war” with God if they choose to violate His Law and commit adultery.
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*A version of this post ran previously.