When a husband is unemployed, his lack of funds is an easy target for cheaters to use as a “reason” to cheat and leave.

When a wife is overweight, her weight is an easy target for cheaters to use as a “reason” to cheat and leave.

 On Weight and Money Rejections

What bothers me greatly is how Christian leaders are complicit in these sort of rejections. They do not swim against the secular cultural streams telling us men are only valuable for being “breadwinners” and women are only valuable for their thin “beauty.”

In fact, some pastors and lay counselors double down on the secular scale of gender valuation.

I had a “Christian” lay counselor tell me that I needed to show my (now ex) wife the money in order to win her back. This was while I was working roughly 50+ hours a week getting credentialed in my field. Not to mention, my (now ex) wife was cheating on me during this whole time as well.

Looking back, this sort of counsel disgusts me. It is precisely an example of hollow worldly philosophies that we are warned about in Colossians 2:8 (NLT):

“Don’t let anyone capture you with empty philosophies and high-sounding nonsense that come from human thinking and from the spiritual powers of this world, rather than from Christ.”

On the side of weight related rejections, I believe women get this one most often…

…although, I suspect faithful spouses of both genders could relate to both types of rejections.

Having excess fat on one’s body does not cause another person to cheat or break their marriage vows. That is not how that works.

Losing weight NEVER ought to be offered as so-called “Christian” advice to saving a troubled marriage!

The health of the person is not the issue here. This is all about looks and a secular philosophy setting beauty standards. Christian leaders need to do better than to get sucked into such secular thinking.

Our bodies–like our finances–change over time. The marriage vows are were not contingent on forever remaining thin or getting rich.

 

When we marry, we vow to remain faithful to our spouse through the inevitable life changes. Period.