With so many divorces happening via “no fault” divorce laws today, it might seem strange to focus on adultery when talking about divorce. I take this objection or concern as an opportunity to explain my blog’s focus and reasoning behind it:
1. I focus on divorce and adultery because that is how Jesus approached the subject of divorce.
While other Biblical circumstances exist surrounding divorce (e.g. abandonment by an unbelieving spouse–I Cor. 7), Jesus always inserted adultery or sexual unfaithfulness into the discussion when he taught on divorce (see Mt 5, Mt 19, Mk 10, and Lk 16). My goal in pastoral ministry is to faithfully follow the Good Shepherd’s example, and I believe I am doing just that by talking about both subjects together as Jesus did.
2. While the Biblical passages on divorce are fairly limited, we do have an abundance of references to adultery and God’s heart concerning adultery in Scripture including a whole book of the Bible built around that motif (see Hosea).
However, if you are like me, you have probably heard more teaching about divorce in your lifetime from the pulpit than you have about adultery. I am seeking to address this Biblical teaching deficit on this blog.
3. Where many circumstances surrounding allowable divorce in Scripture remain unclear due to the limited passages we have on divorce, we do have very clear and consistent teaching–throughout both the Old and New Testaments–allowing both divorce and remarriage in the case of adultery.
If we are confused on the matter of allowable divorce in the case of adultery, one can only assume such confusion will extend to other circumstances even more so. I hope by talking about the clear cases involving sexual infidelity that we may gain better clarity over the subject in general.
4. For lack of solid Biblical teaching and confusion over the matter of adultery, many faithful spouses and families are being hurt, blamed, and shamed.
The tragic thing about this sad situation is that sometimes it is being done by well-meaning–yet dangerously naive–Christians. Someone needs to speak up about this for everyone’s sake. And I would add that I would have placed myself in the dangerously naive camp prior to discovering my former spouse’s infidelity and going through divorce. I am not interested in shaming sincere followers of Christ, yet I am interested in stopping the unbiblical abuse of faithful spouses and their families.
5. Surviving both my former spouse’s adultery and the divorce is my experience.
Simply stated: my focus on both divorce and adultery is such because I am writing from what I know. I have the authority to speak on these subjects as one who has experienced them. In other words, this blog is done in the spirit in which the Apostle Paul writes in 2 Cor 1:3-4:
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God” (NIV).
These are just a few reasons behind my blog’s focus on divorce and adultery. However, the most important reason I am writing this blog is because I feel God has called me to do it, and I must obey my Lord. I hope it has a positive impact upon the Church and faithful spouses/families abroad, but ultimately my blog is a success because I am doing what my God is calling me to do. The rest is a humbling bonus.
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*A version of this post ran previously.
So grateful for your obedience !