The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in people who are trustworthy.
-Proverbs 12:22, NIV
A spouse cannot commit adultery without being a liar.
They vowed to “forsake all others,” and they broke that vow. They lied.
This is an important truth to keep in mind when dealing with a cheater. It is vital to cultivate a healthy sense of skepticism about what a cheater says.
A foolish person takes a proven liar just at his or her word.
Applying this to situations where adultery is suspected–or is confirmed–means not trusting a cheater when he or she claims to never have exposed the faithful spouse to STDs per the timing of their illicit relationship(s). The words need to be backed up with clean STD tests. So…
Get tested!
The cheater may choose to protect their image over protecting their spouse. In fact, this is more likely than not considering their past behavior. Cheaters may lie in order to avoid looking bad.
A cheater has already proven through their actions that they believe their pleasure trumps the safety and well-being of their spouse.
So, a cheater’s word is not enough. It must be verified. That is how a wise person approaches such a situation.
*A version of this post ran previously.
My ex husband was an alcoholic, a pathological liar and cheater. I cannot begin to describe the hell he put me through. Unfortunately, the various so-called Christian churches that I sought out for Godly (Biblical) counseling was absolutely no support at all. They only added to the my traumatic emotional pain. What that man (my ex-husband) did to me was a huge Injustice. It was God’s (Jesus Christ) Grace that sustained me through it all. Thanks, Divorce Minister, for your ministry for hurting and injured former spouses like me.