One thing too many pastors get wrong about faithful spouses is how we are just “looking for a way out” when we divorce our cheater. That is NOT what is happening!
There are far less painful ways to end a marriage than through infidelity discovery. Trust me.
The reality is we–faithful spouses–probably undersold the mess. We did not imagine our spouses could sin THAT much!
It is a sucker punch to the gut to discover that the cheating was MUCH worse than one suspected. Sadly, this is a common story among faithful spouses.
I think we want to think the best even when we have evidence to the contrary. Then the mountain of evidence–or maybe their tortured confession–comes out.
It is SO much worse than we suspected!
The divorce becomes the mercy in these situations (see Mt 19:9). We do not have to remain married to someone who has demonstrated over and over again that they do not care about our well-being or keeping their solemn marriage vows.
