If a wise person goes to court with a fool, the fool rages and scoffs, and there is no peace. -Proverbs 29:9, NIV Cheaters hate your boundaries. They despise accountability. They want what they want, and they want it NOW! I say this to remind you that their anger does NOT mean you are in … Continue reading “Cheater Rage”
Category: Anger
Are you angry with the wicked, too?!
God is a just judge, And God is angry with the wicked every day. -Psalm 7:11, NKJV A common false teaching among Christians is one where anger is treated as sinful. This false teaching serves abusers. Abusers can appeal to this false teaching to manipulate situations and paint their victims as “sinful” for their anger. The question over why … Continue reading “Are you angry with the wicked, too?!”
Cheaters as provokers. Don’t give them the satisfaction.
A person without self-control is like a city with broken-down walls. -Proverbs 25:28, NLT For God will never give you the spirit of fear, but the Holy Spirit who gives you mighty power, love, and self-control. -2 Timothy 1:7, TPT Some cheaters thrive off of provoking the faithful spouse to anger. I believe this. It … Continue reading “Cheaters as provokers. Don’t give them the satisfaction.”
Cheater-Speak: “I was afraid you would get angry…”
“I was afraid you would get angry. That is why I did not tell you [I was cheating on you].” -Cheater Isn’t it amazing how a Cheater can make their lying your fault? Now, we know their lies are their lies. However, Cheaters are adept at shifting blame. In this mind trick: The speaker is blaming their … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I was afraid you would get angry…””
Need to be assertive
After learning about the cheating, it is imperative to be assertive. This is why anger is helpful. I struggled with this one, honestly. The fear of the future and wishing to avoid divorce at all costs–initially–led me to make mistakes. The advice out there for Christians–especially–is generally unhelpful with this. It has a tendency to … Continue reading “Need to be assertive”
Bitterness or anger over injustice?
God is a just judge, And God is angry with the wicked every day. -Psalm 7:11, NKJV Christians are quick to judge faithful spouses as “bitter” without pausing to consider another–more likely–origin of such strong anger: Injustice. To be angry at injustice is a good and godly response to have. It is not “bitterness” but … Continue reading “Bitterness or anger over injustice?”
Anger fades with work and passage of time
God is a just judge, And God is angry with the wicked every day. -Psalm 7:11, NKJV Anger is a healthy, godly response to adultery. I will say that again: Anger is a healthy, godly response to adultery. When we do not feel angry over such injustice and wickedness, something is seriously wrong with our walk with the Lord. He is angry … Continue reading “Anger fades with work and passage of time”
Something “rash”
“Don’t do anything rash,” insists pastor to faithful spouse upon the cheating discovery. Now, I agree to some degree with this advice. The problem is how it is applied. What “rash” means here matters. Often times, the pastor saying this is trying to “save” the marriage. They say this to dissuade a faithful spouse from … Continue reading “Something “rash””
Hate and Adultery
Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. -Romans 12:9b, NIV “If a man is discovered committing adultery, both he and the woman must die. In this way, you will purge Israel of such evil.” -Deuteronomy 22:22, NLT Hate gets such an undeserved reputation among Christians. Sometimes the right thing to do is to hate. Evil … Continue reading “Hate and Adultery”
Wanting to revisit
Cheaters are often in their own fantasy worlds. They might think they get to dictate the narrative and reality; however, they find that they do not truly have that power. This frustrates and angers them. So, watch out when you set that boundary. Some might want to revisit your relationship and talk about “what went … Continue reading “Wanting to revisit”