“There was a judge in a certain city,” he said, “who neither feared God nor cared about people. A widow of that city came to him repeatedly, saying, ‘Give me justice in this dispute with my enemy.’ The judge ignored her for a while, but finally he said to himself, ‘I don’t fear God or … Continue reading “Neo-Calvinism Commandment: “Thou shalt not identify as a victim!””
Author: Divorce Minister
Mailbag: Conquering Anger
The Lord is gracious, and full of compassion; slow to anger, and of great mercy. – Psalm 145:8, KJV Hi DM. I still have a lot of anger toward my mother-in-law for many of the same reasons you had for your father-in-law. She has enabled my stbx’s sin so much that even my children … Continue reading “Mailbag: Conquering Anger”
I didn’t have the words…
I didn’t have the words… …all I felt was incredible anger towards my (now) ex-Father-In-Law. That was my emotional state when I last encountered my xFIL. I did not have the words to articulate why I was so angry with him. My spirit screamed within me that this man was evil and had wronged me gravely. But … Continue reading “I didn’t have the words…”
True Friends Bear The Empathetic Costs
“Let Me Show You the Way” is an old but favorite song from Michael W. Smith. He really captures the heart of true friendship. This song by MWS speaks to what I believe is a human longing. It is a longing for a good friend who loves at a deep, heart-level. These are the friends … Continue reading “True Friends Bear The Empathetic Costs”
People’s Criticisms Say A Lot…
In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise. -Proverbs 10:19, NKJV People’s criticisms say a lot… …but not necessarily anything about the one criticized. This is a lesson impressed upon me during my formal training in clinical pastoral care. It is an important lesson to remember … Continue reading “People’s Criticisms Say A Lot…”
Breaking Up With Your Church
Forgive the corny Oldies reference here. I grew up listening to this sort of music as a kid, and I could not help but think of the opening line when processing this–albeit–serious topic of leaving a church. Breaking up is truly a hard thing to do. This past week Mrs. DM and I decided we needed to … Continue reading “Breaking Up With Your Church”
No Benefit of the Doubt Anymore!
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. – Old Italian Proverb What is actually astounding to me is how cheaters and some pastors/counselors fail to grasp why faithful spouses do not trust cheaters’ words at face value? The wise ones among us require verification. In a healthy marriage, one ought … Continue reading “No Benefit of the Doubt Anymore!”
Innocence Lost
DM on his first wedding day (2006) None of my immediate family experienced divorce. We were a sheltered family system–i.e. from grandparents down to first cousins. Divorce had not visited its devastation directly upon us. That was until my marriage was shot in the head on December 12, 2012. I was raised that marriage was … Continue reading “Innocence Lost”
Fed Up With Religious BS
They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that! -2 Timothy 3:5, NLT My capacity to tolerate religious hypocrisy was greatly diminished by my divorce ordeal with my former in-laws and ex-wife. They were the kings and queens of religious hypocrisy and double-speak. … Continue reading “Fed Up With Religious BS”
Recognizing a Fake Apology
Then Saul admitted to Samuel, “Yes, I have sinned. I have disobeyed your instructions and the Lord’s command, for I was afraid of the people and did what they demanded. But now, please forgive my sin and come back with me so that I may worship the Lord.” -I Samuel 15:24-25, NLT (e.g. false apology) … Continue reading “Recognizing a Fake Apology”