He is right that you do not control him…

…BUT you do control whether you stay in relationship with him!

This is one of life’s hardest lessons to learn: I only control me. It is especially hard to accept when we wish a loved one would behave differently.

Cheaters are big on telling us that we don’t control them–i.e. we’re not their “boss.”

They are speaking truth. AND we–faithful spouses–have truth for them to experience. WE do NOT have to endure their abuse. We can walk away from them, and set a boundary. We can choose to end the marriage via divorce without shame (see Mt. 19:9).

They are not entitled to our trust and connection. A natural consequence of their sinful behavior is the destruction of both.

We all should be careful about absolute statements of independence. Humans were designed to live in community. God did not design us to live apart from Him and community.

Remember:

Satan wanted to be his own “boss”… how is that working out for him?!